The original post did get my heckles up because your not a lone parent. I don't mean to be harsh, just hard not to feel bit irked by that first comment, but I do think you should be allowed to post here for support, we are none of us exactly the same. Being on your own with kids is hard, whatever that looks like.
theres this thing out there at the moment that people with partners feel entitled to say they know 'just' what it feels like to be a lone parent (because husband works shifts, or is away for a week) and I guess that first comment about being a lone parent with a partner kind of triggered that for me...and brings up that wider issue we (well I do) have to face so often. It's something I hear friends saying often. Everytime I hear it I want to cry.
As a lone parent i don't 3 days off every 6 weeks, or have a stable male role model for DS to connect with, I don't have someone to talk to on the phone when I can't afford the bills and I don't know what to do, because I'm alone, and noone gives a toss whether I loose the house, or live or die. I was so I'll for a year on own with D's i got so I'll i had to write a will and try n work out who DS would go to if I died. I'm facing loosing my home right now, I have nowhere go and noone to hold my hand and tell me it will be ok, and i have to look my son in the face and reassure him when I'm terrified inside,, everyday I feel like I've failed him. I hate being a lone parent. It's the worst experience of my life and it's taken huge toll on my health, at least 10years shortened, i can't cope with the emotional and financial burden, (but I get up every day fighting to) my DS will grow up with more disadvantage. He has additional needs as well, so even more isolated. I work as well in a stressful place.
That's why when my friends who have partners say they understand, it chips away another bit of tolerance I have left (I'm running on low).
Equally tho I don't understand their troubles. Having a partner who works away must be hard emotionally, it's probably not what you signed up to either. You must miss your partner very much, and it is tough having to do all the hands on care with the kids, be the only one there to handle a 3 hour tantrum, not be free to pop outside at night. It's hard. I get that.
In terms of feeling lazy, just don't worry about it.
Be lazy. It's ok.
I gave up trying to keep up with 2 parent families a long time ago. (The ones that go to squash, or tennis, or who can leave their non-disabled child in IKEA play area while they have a leisurely shop)
Don't worry about not being perfect, at ours the clothes only get ironed when they absolutely need to be,, my clothes are old, and there's toys everywhere.
I don't worry because you can't do everything. Trying only stresses you out. DS is fed, loved, warm and happy.
Take shortcuts at home and show your kids love. One day they will grow up and you will have plenty of time to do the other stuff then.