Ex text this....

[mpeters82]

Hi,

My son 11 is meant to be seeing his dad today. After not seeing him for a month.

I get a text first saying " am I seeing him today"? You normally ask me what time I am coming. So I responded to this not reading next message the next message he is ill and thinks it be better to see him next week.
So asked him to call but my son sleeping.

I am annoyed but understand these thinhs happen. My son was so looking forward to seeing him. I even want to talk to my ex too.
I hope my son takes him not coming okay.

Do you have a regular schedule set up?

Do you have any reason to believe he’s not I’ll?

ill!

Great wake up message to set me up for a today. I know my ex got an illness but if he felt unwell yesterday why not say. Just gearing my son up for today then cancelled. My son got adhd he knows how he gets. Just sooner I known the better.
I just hope he not lying and hungover. This why I never messaged he goes work then he might go out. Why am I chasing him to see him.
I just think my son be upset.

Once a month now. My son choice but lately he said he made wrong choice to see him once a month on a sunday.
He not seen his dad since last month.

This texts ladies
So what's happening am I still seeing ** today cause u usually texting me what time I'm coming

Then this
"Ok can I know what's happening cause I really not well and the way I feel it might be better me seeing him next weekend"

So why he not knowing what is happening. He should be asking me if he wants to see his son.
He wrote on calender he gave him. My son was so looking forward to seeing him.
I mean if he ill then nothing I can do. But I hope he not lying.
This why my son gets upset. It driving me mad now all this.
He is going to call soon so give you update.

You can/should set up a court order for contact. This really, really helps reduce disappointment.

Yes, you need to set this up, so he has an agreed time when he arrives to collect, and is not waiting for you to call.

You could set as part of the procedure an agreement that he texts younthe night before to confirm, if you both thinkmthat'll help. Or just leave it for either of you to be in touch with the other if illness intervenes or there is some other compelling reason to reschedule.

He is telling you about n these texts, I think, that he is still, available and will come if you give him an arrival time. If you would rather he didn't, he'd like to know asap (presumably so he can go bad to bed and recover). Don't keep him dangling. Just say whether you want him to come, and if so when.

He said when did I tell you I am ill. Then I told you did.
Then he said leave it. This man

You are right

How much for them orders. I was trying to to go this far but he pushing me now.

He put it on my son in last text he sent me aswell.

A friend is helping me. I am trying to stay calm but can see me getting mad.

Even with some sort of legal order you - or the court - cannot force him to see his son.

Been there, done that. It's shit. Best thing to do is to try and build resilience in your son so he can deal with the disappointment.

My ex was trying to blame me then using my son.
He obviously didn't want to come to see him. He said I never said I am ill. I said you did then he said leave it. Then he used his illness and blamed my son. Saying we changed the arrangments many times because of him etc.

I have had this too. He was meant to see them on Friday, cancelled because he was busy. He should have had them from Friday through to Sunday, he rarely manages this, it has been going on for four years. And we have a court order. He has texted me today at 5pm, to ask if he can take them to dinner at 6. School tomorrow, and he claims to not realise their timetable. He is their father, not a stranger. After I said no, he showed up at the door, I told him to leave. And he says I'm unreasonably blocking hm from access.
I have three sons with autism. All I can do is manage the fallout from his behaviour. It just all serves as a reminder of why I left him and relief that I did.

He is acting up aswell. He got adhd