Washed his hands of us

[mustbemad17]

Some of you might recall a few posts I have done regarding my now ex. We were living together, planned this baby, everything seemed okay...until he walked out on us. He's been practically NC since; declined to come to the scan, hasn't bothered with anything to do with the pregnancy.

I messaged him today - it's been doing my head in wondering just how much on my own i'm going to be. I simply asked him to be honest with me about what he sees happening when the baby is born, and to please just tell me if him & his family have washed their hands of us.

Turns out he has 😔 He wants nothing to do with us. That's it. Although I expected it, it feels like someone has kicked me in the gut. I've told him I won't contact him again, I have no need, but I will be going through CMS when the baby arrives.

I've not had to do any of that before, am wondering if someone can just help me get my head straight (currently panicking about all sorts). He obviously won't be going on the BC, but I know I can claim maintainence still. I have no home address for him & he won't willingly give me one...can I claim using his work info?

It probably sounds silly panicking about this now - i'm not quite 20 weeks. But knowing that he has no intention to step up, I feel like I need to have some info behind me.

@mother

Your opinion is very naive ..

I know at least one person who has a man down on childs birth certificate who is not the real father, watch Jeremy Kyle .. sadly the BC may or may not be a factual document.

My DS ( 10) doesn't see his dad since 3..He is on the birth certificate because we were married. He knows who his dad is because he has been told.

The fact a man who has no involvement in my DS's life has pr causes me more hassle in terms of going abroad. I go Europe but would not go further without his consent but am not prepared to open up that can of worms.

If he wants to be a dad he can and he doesn't need a name on a birth certificate to be able to do that.

Naive?! Hahahahaha I'm in the same position as OP! My DD has her father on birth certificate and has her surname and I don't regret it! He has no legal right to remove her from my care (PSO for other reasons unrelated to issues being discussed)

I'd much rather it be like this than have my daughter have a birth certificate with 'Father Unknown' written on it because of her father's behaviour when I DO know who her Dad is! That birth certificate is for my CHILD and not her father! Being on the birth certificate is not a privilege for the father! It is a right of the child's!

Coyoacan You should be ashamed of yourself.
You did that to punish your ex. Your poor child will spend the rest of their lives embarrassed to show their birth certificate just because of your dig at your ex.....

A birth certificate is NOT A PRIVILEGE FOR THE FATHER!!!!!!! It is a RIGHT of their child's!!!!!!!

My dd doesn't have her dad on birth certificate he walked out 2 weeks before she was born and didn't acknowledge her existence until she was 3. We weren't married so I couldn't put him on there. He has been a total pain in arse since and I'm grateful he doesn't have the parental responsibility card to play too.

Which is fair enough. You can't make them attend =\ x