When does it get easier?

[GypsieQueen]

Hi, I'm a single mum to a two and a half year old daughter. She's been going through the 'terrible twos' for a while now. I'm finding it incredibly hard. My little girl is very demanding, a lot of behavioural problems at the moment. I was working full time the last 4 months. It was very hard and I had to take days off when she was poorly and had to leave early when she had a high temperature. My fixed term contract wasn't renewed, unsuprisingly. I'm now a stay at home mum, but get 15 hours funded nursery per week. I'm so depressed and unhappy. I live in a tiny, cold, privately rented house and it's always a mess. I'm finding it so hard to keep clean and tidy. I just want to go to bed and sleep and hide away from the world but I can't. I feel trapped. I want to go out to work again but it's so hard finding work in my field that fits in with childcare. I'm over eating and weigh 13 and a half stone. I know that overeat because I'm so unhappy. I have no family support, no parents who can help out from time to time. I'm wondering if anyone else has been in a similar position and a) when does it get easier and b) how do you cope? Thank you.

I have been there. I know how you feel.

To quote the MN adage... This too shall pass.

I got a part time job in an unrelated field and threw myself at it. Found a brilliant child minder and could then begin to redevelop friendships by inviting people round post bedtime and meeting other parents at social groups fitted around my work hours.
Two years later I was working pretty much full time again and felt a million times better for having done any kind of work.

You can do this and be amazing.

Gypsie, don't feel bad. I bet your dd doesn't see it like that. She thinks you are brilliant.
When it all gets overwhelming, it's much easier to do one little thing than try and deal with it all. I get one room tidy and close the door on the rest. Congratulate yourself on the tidy room. Celebrate it, dance with your dd, make her laugh at the same time. I know it sounds.daft but it works
Then next day choose one other little thing. Stop worrying about overeating for the moment - it's winter & your house is cold so a bit of extra "insulation" is not a bad thing.

Is there a home start near you? It would help pairing up with other mums to provide a bit of support.
And it sounds like your ds is a summer baby so you have 20 months until she starts school full time. Can you use this 20 months to get extra qualified? Or can you find a part-time job with a company where you would like to work full time eventually.
Penguin is right, it will pass eventually. Hang in there x

I'm sorry for the late reply but thank you both for your kind responses. I have tried Home start and it didn't go so well. but it was when my daughter was only a few weeks old, so I might look into it again. I would love to maybe requalify in something else but I can't afford it. Is there a scheme to help single parents to requalify do you know?

My daughter was a summer baby and she will be at school in Sept 2019 so, hopefully then things will be a bit easier.

Thank you again xxx

Try talking to your local tech college. Most have a crèche and you would be eligible for some financial help. It might be a good opportunity. Good luck.