I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!

[user1487175389]

Sorry for the negativity but it's how I feel today.

I feel like I don't exist. Like my life force goes into the kids and that's it. I hate feckin abusive stbx (or should that be never to be ex because I'll never be done with this divorce). I hate his creepy new girlfriend and the way they suck up to the dcs and their friends parents. I hate the school run. Feeling like I'm useless

Didnt want to read and run. Vent here as you wish. Sometimes it sucks xx

I hate it too today. Does it help a bit that you're not alone? I'm sick of what a slog it is every single day. I'm sick of ex ignoring his kids and paying the bare minimum maintenance. I'm sick of waking up worrying about money every night. 'Tis shit.

Understandable it's so hard and often with no or very little let up.

I keep telling myself it will get better and it will get easier. Sometimes it helps. Can you make time for you once they are in bed and try and relax for a short while.

Thanks angrybird & everyone. Sorry it's taken me a while to get back. I got bogged down with Stuff. You know how it is.

So sorry you're going through it too Ashes - I hate that any of us are in this position, but yes, in a way it's reassuring to know I'm not the only one. It's such a flipping slog, isn't it? They're the people I love more than anyone else, but bloody hell it's full on some days! And then I feel guilty for how I feel... And so the vicious circle continues. So sorry that your ex is being so crap. You and the dcs deserve so much better xx

I tell myself that too pinkpixie - I think I'm especially rung out this week because ds has been ill, so neither of us have really slept properly in about 4 days. And that's eaten into my very scarce 'me time'. I quite often put a film on after they all finally go to bed, that sort of thing.

Do you all know lots of other lone parents in rl? I hardly know any, and those I do know have moved on, their dcs are older, they have new partners. Or they have lots of help from family etc. So not really the same. To paraphrase Rachel from Friends, I'm 'alone, alone'

I know a handful of single parents but most of them are now in new relationships anyway.

I struggle through. I call my parents on the odd occasion I get really stuck but this weekend just gone made me realise I need to stop and that they feel like I'm a inconvenience.

Trust me I've struggled this week, I had stitches in my knee Friday, after a silly fall. I've had one friend this week whose done over and above for me. So I now feeling guilty that I won't ever be able to repay her for the amount she's done for me.

I feel alone a lot of the time too. Somehow it must get better tho right? Can listen if it helps.

That's such a shame that your parents have made you feel that way - just when you need them the most. In my case, my mother had a long history of being periodically nasty to me, going NC then reappearing to try and make me apologise. My becoming a single parent made me more of a target - she'd turn up to 'help' with the dcs, and then tell me it was my fault my ex had been abusive, or that I was making it up and shed have to check the veracity of my story with with ex, etc... and in the end I had to cut contact for my own sanity.

Hope the knee's on the mend. It's horrible feeling like there's a debt you can never repay. I had a friend who was similarly helpful when I was first on my own. I suppose we drifted apart, or she just moved on with her life.

I wonder how so many people even find the time for new relationships when they're in this position. I feel like I'm so fussy now, and wary of men, and never meet anyone new anyway!

I think it's time to accept my parents just can't do it, unless it's on their terms. My friends husband was sitting at the hospital with me when they arrived and he told his wife he felt bad leaving me with them as they clearly didn't want to be there!

I'm on dating sites but don't seem to have any interest.

Our lives will get better. They have to we deserve it.