Do you look forward to your DC's spending time with their other parent and then feel bloody bored when they've gone?

[Stiller]

I know I'm lucky to have an ex-p that wants to spend time with DS, lives local and works child friendly hours. I'd find it really hrad to cope without his support.

Ex-p has DS every other weekend and one evening in the week. I love my free evening as I know that I have the whole day to myself after taking DS to school. Ex-p will collect him from school, feed him, bath him and bring him home for bed time. I really look forward to my free weekends as well, but I feel bored and redundant after I've waved him off. I'm sure it comes down to me feeling pathetic about not having any other plans. I miss DS, but I need the break so I wouldn't change it or want to make his weekends away less frequent.

I just wave them off, shut the door and think 'what now?' I'm sitting here now wishing it was bedtime, I'm soooo bored.

Hi Stiller

yes it is hard & sometimes you do feel bored BUT I usually think "right - will spring clean; go to Costa & have a coffee in peace; will browse clothes shop in peace; will sit & read the paper & enjoy myself and ME time

then when they come back, I feel overwhelmed with love & enthusiasm - will read & chat etc

of course its hard but do try to enjoy yourself

how long have you been apart from your partner?

Thanks M'Miggins. We've only recently stopped living together but seperated almost a year ago, but had to carry on living in the same home for finacial reasons.

The split was amicable and I'm relived that ex-p has now moved out. We've managed to salvage mutual respect, but if we'd had to live together longer it would have become hatred for one another.

I know why I feel so miserable on my child-free weekends. I'm bloody lonely and I'm embarrassed about it. My married friends think I'm lucky to have the opportunity to go out, but I don't really because I have no-one to go out with. I really miss the relaxed weekends that come with family life, I just wish I could have that without all the problems that ex-p brought with it. I suppose it comes down to me feeling pathetic that I've nothing to do sociably when DS is away. I could get on with housework, watch TV, have a bath and an early night but I really want to interract with someone.

Whoops - sorry, I'm also TokenChav. Was messing around with alias names earlier on and forgot I'd changed names

i feel the same on the very rare ocassions that I get a break. (about once or twce a year) I feel I should go out, but really I am too tired and drained. The idea of chilling out is preferable. I had a few hours a few weeks ago and needed to stay in to recharge my batteries, but then I felt lonely.
if i had a regular babysitter I would do a course. How about a gym class as a way of meeting new people? I know when my kds are older there are so many courses I want to do

I'm still at the stage where I hate XP having DS. Again like you I know I am lucky he is a hands on father. Luckily I do have friends to go out with and I book up to go out with them. Most of the time I don't want to go (too tired, want to chill, miss ds etc) but as I don't want to let people down I go and I always really enjoy it. But I do miss the weekends of family life with ds (not with xp though).

I feel kind of the same; ex has only been having ds AT ALL for a few months, and he's 3.5. I don't have many friends and none that aren't married. Have found some nice things to do on my own though eg it's lovely just to go to the cinema by myself (I get myself a coffee and a bag of Thornton's toffee to take in!); rent a DVD and order curry; go to bed with chocolate and a good book; or (in daytimes, obviously) do all those really child UNfriendly things you want to do eg look up a good gallery exhibition, or even walk around the shops for a couple of hours...so nice without having to chase a toddler.

I still sometimes wander the house at a complete loss what to do without ds. Agree that I too could do with FAR more adult interaction however it's not really happening atm, so I'm just trying to cherish the free time, and use it for my own good (ie, recuperation!).