What would you do?

[ForeverBlowingBubbles]

An online-friend of mine, who I have known for about 2 years but have never met in 'real life' has just sent me a Christmas card with a cheque for £100 as a gift.

I'm shocked, grateful, etc, but not sure whether I should say thank you and bank it, or say thank you and send it back to her.

I don't know if I would feel right about keeping it.

What would you do?

2 years is a long time, you probably know each other quite well, keep it and send her or him some flowers.

Oooh, is it from a male? Would they expect something in return.
On the other hand there are some genuinly nice people out there.

It's a woman who is a member of a craft group I'm on. The cheque has no strings attached. I think she just knows that being a lone parent I need all the help I can get. While it is a wonderful thing to do, I just don't know whether it would be right to keep it.

id be embarrassed to accept it,but like you i know what a struggle it is being a single parent and this lovely person has probably done what i would do for someone if i had the money.

could you email her and explain you feel a bit awkward accepting it as its a lot of money and then she will hopefully reassure that youre lovely and you deserve etc etc and you wont feel so bad banking it

I have already emailed her and she basically told me to shut up and bank it I do feel awkward about accepting it even though I know it would make her happy if I did. No one has ever given me money before (outside of family) so I'm really not sure how to react. I know that sounds stupid and I could certainly put the money to good use, but.... Part of me is thinking "Take it!!" and the other part is thinking "Nooo give it back!"

Would YOU take it, or give it back???

oh god definitely take it if youve already emailed her. shes probably feeling fantastic to have given it to you, what a great xmas present. enjoy it

Take it, spend it, have fun with it.

If you refuse it she could be offended. I have a friend who is very well off and she thinks nothing of putting £100 in a christmas / birthday card. I used to protest but she says that to her its the same as someone else putting £10 in a card. Her opinion is that its only money and all the time she's got it she'll share it with the people she loves and she gets upset when they don't want to accept it.

OK. All your helpful replies have convinced me to accept it gracefully. It really will make a big difference to my DD and I at this time of year. I am going to do what Fairyfly said and send her some flowers (and a box of chocs). What an amazing woman she is, and hopefully one day I might be able to repay her kindness in some way.

Thank you all for your replies and helping me to make up my mind (it was a very difficult decision for me).

Merry Christmas!
xx

merry xmas to you too and your daughter

Take it. She has done it because she thinks you deserve it, it would be rude to contradict her. She won't have given more than she can afford, people don't as a rule, so bank it, buy a bottle of wine, and drink her good health.

Forever I just wanted to remind you

"the joy is in the giving" I'm sure your friend got a tremendous feeling of happiness knowing what £100 would be to you. Tho I'm sure she'll appreciate the flowers & chocs too!

Hi Mummypumpkin - nothing else has happened as yet

Hi Colditz & Buffysmum - thanks for telling it to me straight

I did send her a very nice email to say I would accept her gift, but she hasn't replied yet.