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Original poster

Opinions please - have I been stupid?

23 replies

SillyBillyBee · 03/12/2006 22:41

I'm a single mum to 1 and have been for 5 yrs. Over the past 6/8 months I've suddenly felt able to move on with my life after going through hell with ds' father. I met someone 3 months ago and we 'clicked' and we are unofficially seeing each other, we don't get together that often as he is away working a lot, he said he wanted some fun which I was fine with.
I went out last night and a mate asked if he could stay at mine which I didn't have a problem with. We ended up having sex, which I am relieved about because there has been sparks between us since we met 3 yrs ago. I just feel so stupid and that I've cheated on the other person even though we aren't together properly. A friend on the other hand has said that I'm not and I haven't cheated.
So your opinions please should I have said no last night or not?
BTW I've posted on here before but under a different name

OP posts:
moondog · 03/12/2006 22:43

Nah.
Forget it.
You're not married to the other guy.
Hope you enjoyed it.You sound like you deserve a bit of fun.

merrylissiemas · 03/12/2006 22:46

you've done nothing wrong. you're single and if man 1 doesn't want any commitment then thats his loss. how did you leave it with man 2?

NappiesGalore · 03/12/2006 22:46

i dont think either of them has to know about the other unless it comes up/becomes an issue... i agree w moondog; you're a free agent and you deserve some fun!

theyre like buses men, arent they

2nervesnapartridgeinapeartree · 03/12/2006 22:48

How would you feel if he had done the same?

Original poster
SillyBillyBee · 03/12/2006 22:53

Thanks, I did enjoy last night, very much so
Didn't leave it any way with man 2 when we woke up, he got dressed and said he had to go and that was that, I really don't think he wants anything between us other than the sex obviously and we still have to be friends.
LOL at the men and buses comment

OP posts:
Original poster
SillyBillyBee · 03/12/2006 22:55

2nerves, I really don't know how I would feel if he had done this to me

OP posts:
2nervesnapartridgeinapeartree · 03/12/2006 22:58

I guess that means it is just fun then and you shouldn't worry about it.

Don't spend time feeling guilty. Your 1st priority is to you lo and yourself. You are allowed a bit of fun you know.

ChristmasMoneypenny · 03/12/2006 22:59

Envy Blush Blush Blush

vitomum · 03/12/2006 23:01

in answer to your question - no, not stupid in the slightest. You've enjoyed yourself and that's a good thing. you go girl

NappiesGalore · 03/12/2006 23:08

glad it was fun

lou33 · 03/12/2006 23:12

been there done that with the bloke i am seeing now

we agreed it was just gonna be fun, and he said he didnt mind if i saw someone else as long as he knew

well we had a falling out, as well as me not being able to see him for his commitments for a few weeks, so i wasnt sure if i wanted to see him again, and spent the night with another guy

told him about it afterwards as agreed and he got really really upset, i had a few days of shit from him for it.

then we met up and have been a proper couple since, so it worked out well for me i think, it made him realise what he wanted

bloke i spent the night with wasnt that good either

ChristmasCaroligula · 03/12/2006 23:13

You haven't cheated on the other person. You're not in a committed relationship with him, you're just having fun, which is what he wants. I don't see the problem tbh.

So true about the buses. It really is sods law.

ellesbells · 04/12/2006 18:55

god im soooooooooo jealous!! two men? greedy woman

climbingrosie · 04/12/2006 20:09

Don't think oyu've been stupid! It's not like you are in a relationship with this guy or anything!!

I've done similar, why not have a bit of fun when you're single??? As long as everyone is clear where they stand from the start (which seems to be the case here!) then you aren't doing anything wrong and not hurting anyone.

Good on you girl!

Original poster
SillyBillyBee · 04/12/2006 21:58

Thanks for all the replies. lou, I remember reading about you and your bloke a while back, glad it working out ok for you.
I'm not feeling quite so stupid today and I have no regrets so like you have all said I may as well enjoy myself while I'm single

OP posts:
lou33 · 05/12/2006 09:41

you may as well have fun while you can, you never know when it will stop!

Bugsy2 · 05/12/2006 10:18

What fun - nothing to feel stupid about at all! This has got to be one of the up sides of being single.

lou33 · 05/12/2006 10:56

hey bugsy how are things with you?

Bugsy2 · 05/12/2006 11:53

Hi Lou, not so bad. Date on Thursday night. Have chatted lots on the phone & get on really well. Just hoping he looks like his pic & that I fancy him!!!!
Have you got kids sorted for NY trip in new year?

lou33 · 05/12/2006 13:49

oh boy i hope it goes well for you too!

yes i have thanks, we leave 31st dec come back 5th jan

also i am going away overnight to brighton on 17th dec with him, we are going to a gig, my xmas pressie to him, and i think at some point i will be calling another favour as i have a feeling he is booking a pampering spa day for me for my pressie

can you post an update of your night out?

plus, how old is he, what does he do etc?

lou33 · 05/12/2006 13:50

oh, but i forgot to say we are going to prague now not NY

happyatlast · 15/12/2006 18:41

If you are not officially seeing this guy then you are free to see others in my opinion.

helenhismadwife · 15/12/2006 21:25

good on you I say, you are not in a realationship so have some fun and enjoy being single

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