Have an 11 yr old and we've literally just been to court for contact. The offer of contact was always there for him he just refused it. Anyway he got alternate weekends and anything else we can agree on. I've asked him if he would like a couple of nights for tea in the week but he refuses.
11yr old DS clearly misses dad, when he visits he returns home with the usual gifts, most weekends having had 100 quid spent on him.
Recently I've found messages from dad on DS phone, telling him now he's 11 he can chose where he wants to live. Ive spoken to DS who said he wants to live there cause dad treats him. Hardly a sufficient reason. He's happy at school and home and has a good group of friends. He's due to start high school soon and I want him to start on a good note. I don't want him starting thinking "i dont have to do anything here because I'm leaving soon"
DS friend has told me she will miss him in 3 weeks time when he moves, which is what DS has been telling her!
Ex is not someone I can approach. Everything he does is to get at me. If I say no he says yes, anything to cause me problems.
I've explained to DS that when he's finished school he can then chose.
Any advice with how else to approach this?