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Chatting with Man Overseas............... advice?

8 replies

lovemykids · 16/11/2006 22:24

Has anyone met and had a relationship/married a man from overseas over the net?

I'm on a dating site chatting to a really nice man in Canada and I'm just wondering if it's a complete waste of time - whether it would actually come to anything? Finding myself wondering why he should actually bother with me so far away when he can probably have a relationship closer to home - whether I'm just a bit of 'fun' for him/someone to chat to and nothing else?

Trouble is I quite like him!!

Anyone had any experience of dating overseas?

OP posts:
shebnem · 17/11/2006 07:32

if i were u i would prefer somebody nearer to me.

shebnem · 17/11/2006 07:33

and not a married man.
you already see the situation yrself.

rainbowgirl · 17/11/2006 13:07

i'd give it a wide berth!

sanchpanch · 17/11/2006 14:55

does he come to england for worketc

i have been chatting to a man on net for a few weeks now and he still hasnt asked me out and i so wish he would!!! mind you i would probably be to scared to turn up- havent been on a date in ages!!

lovemykids · 17/11/2006 19:58

Thanks for the advice. I know I should listen to what you are saying, but I do like him (or should say THINK I do!)

He's just invited me over there today!! My head says he should come here first but my heart and the craziness in me says just go, what the hell! I could do with being adventurous for once in my life - had 12 years of marriage to a really boring man - no fun whatsoever! I feel like I'm free and the world is my oyster so why not?! I have another friend over there who I've been chatting to for ages (again over the net) and I know he'd look out for me while I was over there -the two live pretty close together!

Hi Sanchpanch - you and I had our xh leave us around the same time - I remember chatting to you at the time!!! You're in the MK area aren't you?

I'd say look elsewhere personally - if he hasn't asked you out by now then perhaps he just wants to chat - I've had quite a few like that and then they fade away! The ones I've met up with from the dating site I'm on - it took a few little hints/nudges from me to get the first one to suggest a date - he did but then never got round to arrange a day/time etc so I actually asked him if he would like to meet! Turned out I wasn't attracted to him when we met (although we got on brilliantly over the net!) - he is just a great friend to me though and texts me all the time and would take me out or keep me company at the drop of a hat. The other one asked me out after a few emails - (lied about his age and put a photo on his profile that was 6 years old - had let himself go totally and didn't look at all like his photo) but there was something I quite liked when we met so I gave him a chance but again no chemistry! - we got on well so I went on a few dates but he's just turned out to be an ass cos I wont sleep with him! and he's turned shitty! Can do without men like that! I think you just have to take a chance sometimes to find out what they are really like and definitely listen to your gut instinct - the second one I had an issue with not fancying him and a few other things but thought I was being shallow as I enjoyed his company - looks aren't everything (are they?) - but obviously I was picking up that something wasn't quite right! And now I've just told him I don't want to be with a man who doesn't respect my values etc. Being shitty about me not sleeping with him straight away says to me he definitely isn't the right man to be with!!

SP - If you fancy cat'ing me - please do.

OP posts:
rainbowgirl · 17/11/2006 20:19

be careful hon. seriously.

sanchpanch · 18/11/2006 18:05


I would definately be careful, as i am sure you would anyway, i know what you mean about wanting to be adventurous but you have got your small ones to think about now it is not the same as being single without the kiddies!!

Is is definately a long way to go for a date but if you dont go you will never know.

by the way he has asked me out!!!!!!!!!
but i am way to scared to go , i havent been on a date for 6 years!!! i could do with losing a stone before i meet him, although i did put on my profile medium build, so he knows i am not a skinny minny!!!

lovemykids · 19/11/2006 20:11

Hi Sanchpanch

Great news that he's asked you out - you go for it! Don't be underconfident, just go and have a bit of fun, with no expectations. He may not be like his profile either! And at the end of the day it's not all about looks! One of my dates was with an overweight man (not apparent in his slim photos!) but gave him a chance because his personality shone through (just a pity it didn't last long enough!) but I would have carried on seeing him if he hadn't ended up an arse!

I hadn't been on a date for 15 years! but thought it's got to happen at some point!

As for the guy in Canada - we've chatted some more and I've asked how he felt about coming here instead, he said he would so it's just a case of getting to know him better and then making the necessary arrangements.

Let me know how your date goes if you do meet - go on do it!!! You may find he's just not the one for you - but at least you've made that all important first step back into dating, or you could like him and end up as great friends (like I did with the first guy I met!), or you could get on great and end up in a relationship - what have you really got to lose?

If you want to know the free dating site I'm on - please cat me - like all the sites, there are idiots on there and you have to weed the good ones out, but it's great fun and I speak to lots of guys - thats fun in itself just having a laugh and getting men's advice etc.

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