i would name change but what is the point basically what happened is this
last year my teen daughter told the police her stepdad abused her in the worst way there was no physical evidence and when i made a police statement it turned out her version of events didnt match mine she claimed to be at home on several occasions with him when he was actually with me and she was with other people (im being deliberately obtuse here) he was arrested bailed away from the family home we have two children together they were given supervised access with there dad he was to have nothing to do with my daughter at all then she said she was confused and uncertain about events and she then withdrew the allegation prior to this i had limited contact with childrens services because they were supposed to be doing an assessment right from the start i had issues with the ss she didnt communicate with me she told me nothing about the contact i had to communicate with my ex about it which was uncomfortable for me considering what he was accused of
she rang me and accused me of being with him and our children in town one day which i deny when she came to my house my teen confirmed i was home that day as did my father dh bail was up in january i volunteered to continue the supervised contacts and she agreed to approve my dad for contact supervisor then my dd retracted her statement and all hell broke lose she took it to a child protection conference and all three children were put on the register the younger two for emotional abuse dd for sexual during the meeting she agreed for me to be referred to stronger families she agreed to approve my dad i was to start the freedom program and she was to see the children fortnightly 10 week later she had done nothing she finally (after a call from my solicitor) came out it went badly she verbally berated me shouted at me lied to my dd about things and threatened me with a PLO she wanted me to stop contact with my ex and force it to a court situation i didnt want to do that as the supervised contact was working fine i did not wish to take my kids through court she said she cant cut off contact only i can she was so massively bad behaved i put in a formal complaint via my solicitor this has made her worse
we went to conference the conference chair told her she needed to try harder and berated her for not making her statutory visits he also got her to agree that the children should be seen as individuals and there cases considered separately he made a move to get my youngest of the register which the ss did agree to but no one else did so they all stayed on the recommendations were again that i get referred to stronger families i continue with the freedom program and i needed to text her if my ex came over to collect his possessions (the kids were to be out of the house obviously) also in conference ss agreed to allow my ex to take me unsupervised to my youngest hospital appointment
again nothing happened she made no visits core group came and she demanded time to see dd the conference recommended that she was seen outside of school time as this was her preference ss didnt want to do that so we arranged her a time during school when she could see her she was also supposed to ring dd teacher and get her timetable she didnt see her that week she did accuse me during core group of being seen as resistant to her seeing dd i genuinely wasnt i just didnt have her updated schedule to hand no one did as it was being redone that week she didnt find out till that Wednesday and if ss had gone when she was supposed to she would have told her she was also supposed to call me the week before core group to find out and did not
when she went to see dd, dd was a bit resistant and teen like i know it was because she was being seen in school which is not her preference but she is making it more than that
today i received a letter for a PLO meeting it states they dont believe im protecting my children that im minimizing the risk ex is to my children and putting them at risk
i dont get it i do all they say he has his twice weekly supervised contact only dd has no contact with him i do the freedom program he has no outside contact with them i text every-time he has to collect his things (literally a couple of times) i maintain a reasonable relationship with him for the sake of the children he literally has no unauthorized contact with them no phone or physical she has not referred me to stronger families she has given me a family support worker who i saw briefly i gave her a rundown as to what happened and why things were tense with ss and myself she saw dd and i told her she was supposed to be seeing our eldest she agreed to do that i have chased the family support worker from here to there to get the support for my family we were authorized four sessions two have already passed two to go
ive engaged with children services but by her own admission she has not done enough she has been told time and time again to engage with the family to make referrals and im being accused of not engaging with them what the fuck am i supposed to do now she is accusing me of being groomed and abused by my ex i agree he was not ideal but fucking hell he did not treat us that badly he wasn't perfect but who is and in any case im doing freedom that really is all i can do i literally cant do more than that im terrified im going to lose my children when she asked me to cut off the contact with my ex she told me if i did she would back me in court if i didnt she would take me to court she is now taking me to a plo
i will update later my youngest has just woke up
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.
Lone parents
social services railroading me
7 replies
chickenfuckingpox · 16/06/2015 22:25
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.