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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Any lone parents here work solely from home and/or self employed? At end of tether with job. :-(

8 replies

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 18/05/2015 14:30

Long story short but I'm a single parent to an 8yo whose dad chose not to be involved, so I'm sole carer. I work 3 days a week in a job I absolutely detest. It's having an awful effect on my mental health to the point that my off-work days and weekends are tainted by the fact I've got to be back there in a few days. I fucking hate it Sad. It's affecting everything. When I'm at work I'm utterly miserable and want to cry. When I'm not at work I feel like I cba to do anything I enjoy and all I do is comfort eat crap. In addition my parents are elderly, one has heart issues and one has Alzheimer's, so I'm dealing with that. I'm at the end of my tether. I almost handed in my notice last November but a friend talked me out of it, as he said it'd be just exchanging one set of issues for another and he was right - I still need to pay rent, bills, food etc, just like everyone does.

I'm looking into work from home opportunities and I'm wondering if anyone on LP works solely from home and/or for yourself, and if so, what do you do? I'm considering a few options and have just applied to a wfh company, but I'm worried about finances. I currently earn 12k and get WTCs and a small amount of housing benefit (plus I get sick pay and a tiny pension from work). I wouldn't leave work voluntarily and go on JSA as I want to work, but I'm nervous of making the leap from employed to self employed, and the effect that might have on my benefits. Would they sanction me for leaving a job, or doesn't that count if you become self employed?

If anyone has gone from employed to self employed, I'd really appreciate any advice.

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LlamaLover · 18/05/2015 17:11

Hi. I was made redundant and now work for myself. Been going about 2 years now and it's going well. Is there a hobby or skill you could develop to start your own business? I personally prefer that to a direct selling job as all of the benefits go to you and you have all the control. Good luck, it's the best thing I ever did. I work hard, but enjoy it tremendously and if the kids are ill I can be there for them as I too am doing it on my own.

TheGirlFromIpanema · 18/05/2015 17:18

I have in the past, mostly bookkeeping and small accounts. Tried other p/t 'opportunities' and tbh they were all much hard work for very little reward.

I think a 'real' job that can be prerformed at home rather than a wfh 'opportunity' is the way to look at getting started.

Good luck Smile

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 18/05/2015 17:27

When I said 'opportunities' I meant actual work - I've made it sound like I'm looking for dodgy stuff Grin. I don't want to work for any MLM company either. No, I want a proper job. I've just done a test application to do web search evaluation which will be a good start if I pass and get work through that. I'll need something else too though as I'm not sure that'd give me enough hours.

What do you do Llama? I'm interested in health, fitness and nutrition but not qualified in any of those areas, unfortunately. I've considered everything from dog walking to cleaning to marketing (which is similar to what I do now).

OP posts:
LlamaLover · 18/05/2015 18:35

I run my own company that rents and sells baby carriers. It's something I'm passionate about and have qualifications for. But the passion means the most, I could probably do it without the qualifications, they are more for my own benefit to be honest.

Starlightbright1 · 18/05/2015 20:26

I work from home I am a childminder

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 18/05/2015 21:20

Thanks Llama, sounds fab. I definitely couldn't be a childminder, it'd drive me mad, plus I rent so doubt I'd be allowed anyway.

OP posts:
sunnyforlife · 19/05/2015 22:12

Hi there. I REALLY feel for you as I was in your position too three years ago, in a job I absolutely hated. I was being isolated and bullied at work and if I am totally honest it's one of the reasons I was so desperate to get pregnant so I could take time off and re-evaluate. And I did! I'm a lone parent by choice, pregnant via sperm donor and had twins in 2013. They changed my life! The children gave me the confidence to jack my job in after my maternity leave ended as I knew I could not bring up kids with them seeing mum so unhappy and depressed. Luckily, there was some redundancy money around which gave me 'back up'. I applied for a couple of jobs and now work part-time 3 days a week as a researcher for a film company. Not the best paid, but lovely people, creative atmosphere and best of all am around to look after the kids. I have no idea what the future holds but today I have my beautiful children, my health, my sanity and something to strive for. Money is very tight (never buy clothes, budget like crazy) but somehow it doesn't matter because I am happy for the first time in years. I just want you to know it can be done - so please don't be afraid. I wish you the very best of luck.

griselda101 · 19/05/2015 22:29

i'm a creative professional (design) and i made the transition from employed (in a part time admin role) to self employed very slowly, cutting down on employed and taking more self employed work over a couple of years. (this was before I had a kid).

the moment i completely jacked in the employed work things really took off for me, but i had been s/e for several years in a part time capacity building up to it.

I'm a lone parent of a toddler and really lucky I've been able to work while he's been little - I've not had to take a career break and still have work and can do it around him (to an extent). I would recommend anyone doing it.

I would say maybe find a job you could do say one day a week (employed) then use the other two days to work on your business and get more clients or business being self employed. then at least you have a back up. When you're more established you can completely give up the employed role.

Sometimes it takes a while to get the business off the ground but depends on you and what you're doing. Don't get disheartened if it takes a while to take off.

There are great things to being self employed, and negatives too.

Great things: being your own boss, flexible working hours, more £ per hour, more interesting work, more experience as you do different things and more interesting projects, probably looks better on your CV if you decide to go back into work, not having to spend time working with people I can't stand (!!) - probably one of the best things about it!!

Bad things: working into the night / weekends sometimes, doing accounts, sometimes more stressful / being stuck at home a lot!!

I would say that there are potential negatives around a lack of work, but I never experience that - always have too much on. Although I have the guilt factor and never turn down work just in case next week / month is a quiet one. so I always seem to be oversubscribed!!

On another positive you'll have more time during the day to do stuff you otherwise might not, as you can spend evenings working instead. So in a way it can be a cheaper lifestyle (e.g. I can go charity shopping at leisure rather than having little time to shop at weekends). You can also offset some legitimate expenses to tax (e.g. part of your line rental, mobile phone, internet etc) if you use them for your business.

Definitely worth it and I would say go for it, just maybe have a back up plan and also more than one skills set you can outsource (e.g. I backed up mine with freelance admin for a bit which was great as a second self employed income source while the design stuff took off).

Some people just aren't meant to be part of a larger company / organisation - I spent years unhappy feeling like a dogsbody - when I went fully self employed it was a revelation and one I don't regret for a minute.

Wishing you luck :-)

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