it's my birthday and i'll cry if i want to [grin]

[cathblowsoutcandles]

so i'm 29 today and it's the first time for years and years that i've spent my birthday without a man around, this time last year dp and i were blissfully happy and now i'm too scared to check my email account in case he's sent me a mail which ruins my day either because it's not nice enough or too nice

it's been ok so far actually but it just doesn't seem fair that all these joyful things (birthday, scan, christmas, dd's birthday, most of all the birth!!..) are fast turning into endurance tests i.e. can' i get thru this alone? can i get thru this without him?

on the plus side, my mum took me out for lunch, which was nice, and some kind man said 'is it your 21st?' i could have kissed him, though he probably would have been a bit taken aback given that my bump is now definitely showing...

Happy Birthday!

It was my birthday two weeks ago and I was dreading it. Since my Mum died(four years ago) no one spoils me for my birthday and I know that I am in my 30's now but it's hard tp break the habit of wanting to be made a fuss of. I have been married to a monster for 4 years(he didn't start out a monster unfortunately) and on my first birthday with him, his friend told him that he must make a real effort. He was broke that weekend so his friend lent him £150 pounds to buy me a gift and take me out for a meal(she even booked the table!). On the birthday night he said that he had seen something he really wanted and did I mind if he got that and we did something for my birthday next weekend(payday). Happy-go-lucky me said Ok and he went off and bought four second hand tyre rims for his clapped out old banger(that I bought him for no paritcular occasion). He gave me a huge card and cheap teddy from Clinton cards and asked me to lie to his friend and say we went to the restaurant. I should have known that I had signed up to a marriage of misery right then and there. This year despite all this I asked a friend a few days before if I thought he would send me a text(which is all I got last year). She said that he ought to but you never know with him. I am still annoyed with myself that I was happy that he texted me and then took our son out to buy me a card and a present on the day. I wondered where the sudden change had come from. Anyway last week I found out that the shameless woman that he abandoned me and our son for is pregnant by him(incidentally he has walked out on her too).Next year, I hope he doesn't have the cheek to send any kind of greeting or better still that he has crawled back under the rock from whence he came.
Also, my four year old could not understand that Mummies have birthday's too and spent the whole day saying 'is it my birthday, when is my birthday, can I have my birthday tomorrow?'which was really cute and makes it all worthwhile.

happy birthday!

Oh Cath (and Kikki) you have to spoil yourselves as much as you spoil your dc on their birthdays. I think most women have to organise their birthdays because left to the menfolk, nothing would happen, would it?

Cath, when is your baby due?

my baby's due on march 30 SSSandy. LOL kikki at your useless ex buying car tyre rims with your birthday money, how could he?? grrrrrrrr. i'm really upset actually i just got a one line email from him saying happy birthday which i guess was better than forgetting but pretty f'd up considering i still don't even know where he is!

Happy birthday