Dd needs a hair cut

[18yearstooold]

I'm well aware that dd needs a haircut but she also needs food in her belly, clothes on her back and a roof over her head so I tend to prioritise those over haircuts

She's come back from her 1 day a month with her dad, telling me 'dad and nana say I need a haircut, but I like it long'

AIBU to think if he wants her to get her haircut so much he's been going on about it all day (according to dd) that he should stick his bloody hand in his pocket?

And I know this isn't AIBU but gah!

I think you should let her keep her hair long if she likes it long whether or not you or anyone else thinks she needs a haircut. Also, don't you own a pair of scissors? It isn't too difficult to cut a straight line if she does want it cut, but you don't want to pay for it. I do agree that he could offer to pay for it. Why does her hair need to be cut if she likes it long?

Same problem here, as well as 'dad said I need some new trainers' but yet 'dad' dosnt pay a bloody penny towards his ds! I feel for you there nothing worse than a moron of an ex!

It needs a good trim because its really dry at the ends but i'm quite happy for her to keep it long

It's curly, i'm not going near it with a pair of scissors!

Word of warning, how would you feel if her father or grandparents did cut her hair?

Do you have a local hairdresser who is looking for models. We have a college that teaches hairdressing near us and they are always looking for models for their year three students. Almost qualified and very well supervised.

If it was anything except her hair such as trainers I'd tell him to get his hand in his pocket.

I wouldn't mind, she's 11 so I can't see a hairdresser cutting her hair to her shoulders if she asked for a trim

Or would they? I know mine wouldn't

It must be nice to live in a world where the price of a haircut is irrelevant and you can afford to feed and clothe your child...

You could repeat the first line of your post to your ex. He won't understand - those that haven't had to make harsh choices like this simply won't. But you are doing your best for your dd and so shouldn't feel guilty about your choices.

I get my own hair cut about once a year, if I can afford it. Ds more often because being a boy he needs it. But his is paid from maintenance money nowadays. I couldn't afford the 6 for him to have it cut every 8 weeks otherwise and used to do it myself when he was at primary school (till I realised what a mess I made - he has curly hair too).

At least they are suggesting it rather than going ahead and doing it without checking with you first. Can you suggest to your ex or to 'nana' that if they want to get her hair trimmed next time that's fine, but your dd wants it long so not to get too much cut off.

I understand your frustration OP. On the rare occasions that DS sees his dad, he is guaranteed to moan about his perfectly adequate clothes. They are always freshly washed whenever he goes there. However, not once has he offered to buy anything to replace the clothes that he dislikes so much.