Scared witless!

[barmybird]

I need help! today I received a copy of a letter which my solicitor has sent to my x husband. Basically we are divorced but the financial side of things was never finalised, we just had an agreement. I took a lump sum out of the marital home he had the rest and agreed to pay half the nursery fees.

Now my solicitor has advised that I pursue a further lump sum and get things legally tied up. He has messed me and dd about a bit lately and to be honest money is tight so I agreed to her sending a letter. Now I've seen it I'm terrified as to how he will react. We rub along as long as I don't challenge him or interefere with his life and plans. If I do he gets very intimidating. God knows what he will do when he sees this letter.

I guess my questions are has anyone else done this? is it worth all the stress. All my friends say yes but its not them who have to deal with the stress. I just don't know what to do. The letter has gone so I'm in the brown stuff anyway so how do I deal with the storm which is about to hit?

Any tips?

First of all it's never wise to wait too long to sort out the finances so well done for getting on with it. Some people leave it for years and find they've a new house and their ex husband is entitled to half a massive increase in its value etc.

Secondly great if the letter scares him. Serves him right. About time he realised you have some rights too.

Third, I never speak to my ex (he won't speak to me) so can't you just not talk to him, communicate by email e.g.

Thanks. I know it needs sorting once and for all he has been pretty much doing as he pleases recently and I have got to stop that for my dd sake if nothing else. I'm just not sure about my legal position? I hope my solicitor would not encourage me to go back for another lump sum if there was no chance of me getting it? but do I have a right to do this? doesn't our informal agreement stand?