Starting AGAIN!

[astewart]

Left my exH some time ago with absolutely nothing.
Managed to get social housing and all friends and family mucked in and helped me out. Met DP (known him years really) and relationship began, 8 months in we moved in together, me giving up my house and him getting a mortgage. This is the most stupid mistake I ever made!
Things aren't going so well and I think I'll need to leave soon.
I have nothing again!
I feel like I've let my dc down so bad.
It's for the best but I'm so worried.

Hello astewart, I have been meaning to write in response to your post for a week or more. I also find myself in the unfortunate situation of having to start all over again - the second time. The first time my partner succumbed to alcoholism following on the stress of having a child, and the second time my partner became violent from the night of our wedding onward until I had had enough 10 months in and ended it. I am now 8 months past that and feeling mostly okay. I have some very down times when I curse myself for trusting him and for letting myself get sucked into some false sense of security - but that doesn't help as hindsight is 20-20 and I couldn't have known he would become the monster he ended up being.

If your family and friends supported you once they will do it again, I am sure of it. And don't feel like you've let your DCs down because you haven't - quite the opposite, you had the courage to try again, and that is something they will see and take with them into their lives. Rather than teaching them to give up on love, you've instilled in them the realisation that one can try again.

So pick yourself back up, dust yourself off, and give it your best go each day to either try to save your relationship if there is anything left to save, or to support yourself and your children, ask for the help you need, and move on.

I hope this helps. Hang in there.

It does. Thank you.
Didnt really look at it that way. yes I tried, didnt work, move on. Timing could have been a little better, i now have to furnish an entire house in the run up to xmas which isnt good......have to find house first mind!

I think it's important to have the right perspective - new house = fresh start, get some furniture on free cycle, there is loads of great stuff on there, then ring in the new year around family and friends so that you can look forward to the future. That's what I intend to do :-)