Newly single parent

[Crushed2914]

Hello,
I've found myself a newly single parent with a 4 week old baby girl, my first child. My husband had been having an affair all the way through my pregnancy & still sleeping with her as I was in hospital with our daughter who was having tests (still ongoing) anyway. Finding myself having to go through the labyrinth of benefit entitlement. He was the main earner, I'm now on SMP, can't live in our home so I'm living with my parents. To say my life feels like a nightmare is an understatement, at least I have her lovely face to get me out of bed every day.
He's pushing for contact. I'm appalled but know he'll have to see her. We split just over a week ago.
I have consulted a solicitor who suggests he gets no more than an hour at first under female family supervision (he doesn't know how to take care of a baby & his mum passed)
He's withholding information about his earnings to allow me to calculate maintenance, he's claiming he doesn't make a profit on rentals he has.
I'm feeling an absolute array of emotion right now, but don't know how long to leave it before I allow him to see her.
If she was a toddler who knew who he was it would be a different matter I know he'd have to see her ASAP but with everything he's done & shown no remorse for I'm just so so angry.
Has anyone been in a similar situation & what did you do about contact? TIA

BTW. It was his decision to split. I asked him to stop the affair & work it out, he said no.

So sorry to hear this, what a bastard. Just get the best legal advice you can. Completely understandable that you don't want to let him see the baby. He's been having an affair and is now hiding financial information so he can getting away with paying the minimum to support his child?! Absolute bastard. He doesn't deserve a thing.

Hello 2914 I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

It looks like you have good grounds to divorce him for adultery!

If you have been advised for just one hour at first, then go with that. Don't deny contact, but allow the minimum legal amount. Try to correspond via email so that it's all written down though perhaps create a new account for this and check it periodically rather than having your personal inbox bombarded with his spam.

I don't know what job you were doing before, but if you're unemployed, contact your local Job Centre to see a Lone Parent Advisor who can advise you about your rights to benefits after ML. Also phone tax credits and your local authority about housing as you might be able to access local authority housing.

You could also perhaps contact Gingerbread for single parent advice.

In the meantime, I suggest getting out as much as possible, seeing lots of friends and going for walks. Staying with your parents, make sure that they know that it's your baby and do things your way.

The relationship board is great for support when divorcing a shit head like your ex. Good luck OP, Sezam