that thorny issue - Maintenance

[mycatisorange]

Opinions please !! Split with partner at Easter. He has been out of work for over 2 years now. Playing at trying to earn money via FB etc - spends hours & hours still & when we were together but has made about £30!!!
He is living on half of what we got when we sold the house. running a big car - unlike me who runs small cheap car. He's living in lovely 2 bed flat - using one room as an office. I am renting a house from my cousin. So far he has not given me a penny for our 2 kids. He has bought a couple of bits of clothes for them & does have them over to stay. My question is even though he's not earning should he still give the kids maintenance from his share of what we had left? He lives just behind an ASDA - so he could easily work. I resent it because I clean & look after a lady with Alzheimer's to bring some money in - not exactly what I wanted to do with my life but that's another story. My dad is furious & wants me to get onto a solicitor but I was trying to avoid anything like that. From what I've read & the calculator as he earns nothing he has no maintenance to pay!!

The CSA can only make them pay something like £5 a week when they are on JSA.
I tried to get a solicitor to get exDP to pay but she wouldn't take on the case and said to go through CSA.
You will have a battle on your hands whatever you decide to do. If they don't want to pay they will find a way to avoid it!
It took me over 5 years to get any money out of exDP through the CSA.

I am afraid it is on income so I think it is now £7 through the new CSA..

You've not said how old your children are. I'd be tempted to cut my losses and leave him to it.

They can only make him pay £7 and with the new system, you need to pay £20 for them to start a case and they encourage you to sort it out between yourselves anyway.

With tax credits, my income of £12,500 is around £20,000 a year - I have one child and have no maintenance payments (and no contact). We are happy on our own and we are able to go away a few times a year and DS does a few activities a week - not like we're on the bread line at all.

Just to say as well that I have a friend who pays his ExW £350 a month for his two children - and wow, would that be nice to have each month!!

BUT - we picked wankers to father our children and though they are beautiful and make us laugh and smile (and make our lives worth living!!) - having a reasonable amount of maintenance just is not and option so better to just stop worrying about it.

Tell you're dad that you know, you're frustrated too - but it's not going to change.

I went back to Uni when ds was 3 and did a law degree. I was by myself, had naff all help and had to work in pubs and shops, but I did it. There's always a way, don't let anything hold you back from something you want to do. Don't invest your time thinking about him and what he should be doing, spend it getting to where you want to be. Yes, he should be contributing no matter what. If he can't contribute financially, he can help by caring for your children more so that you can go to uni or do something to make your life better.

If he can't contribute financially, he can help by caring for your children more so that you can go to uni or do something to make your life better.

Goo suggestion, LadySybil.