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separating / getting back together - implications?

4 replies

firstchoice · 19/08/2014 13:16

Hi, not sure how to put this best, and hope I don't offend / sound trite?

I have been married for 13 years. It has been rocky.
We have had a lot of stress and the marriage has suffered.
We have agreed to separate.
I want to move out of the house and rent elsewhere with children
(for health and education reasons).
House will have to go on market for me to obtain HB.
(I have taken legal advice).

I will claim HB on a private rental as I do not work at present (DLA and ESA (wrag). I have been told I do not need to be legally separated for this.

What would happen should we find that the new health and education settings reduced the stress to the extent that we eventually got back together? I know that sounds stupid, but I genuinely don't know if it might make a huge difference? I would have to go first with the children as a single parent. IF and its a big IF things improved, what then?

Would we be 'allowed' to get back together if we wanted to? Take house off market? Would we have to pay back HB?

Sorry if this annoys / offends anyone.
I am not 'playing' with the idea of being a single parent, but am scared silly of implications if I AM and then later if we were to re-form as a couple?

OP posts:
firstchoice · 19/08/2014 16:49

anyone there?

OP posts:
firstchoice · 19/08/2014 18:18

hellloooooooooooooooo?

OP posts:
starlight1234 · 19/08/2014 19:52

Not ignoring your post but really no idea.

I do wonder if you are really ready to seperate..have you considered Relate?

firstchoice · 19/08/2014 20:43

Yes, completely ready.
The marriage has no chance in our current circumstances which are extremely stressful.
I want to change those circs and to do this I need to move area.
I need to do this as a single parent.
Whether he might follow later if things improved I do not know.
But cannot go on like this.
Thanks for your reply. x

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