I know I shouldn't get wound up, but anyway....
I went to work today and ExP looked after ds aged 2, grudgingly. It was at my house as ex lives far off. I don't have any childcare other than cm and she's on holiday. I got home this evening after a shit day and my house looked like armageddon.
Ex handed ds to me immediately and went upstairs to make some work phone calls. I had to give hungry ds tea, when the kitchen was filthy and lunch still not cleared 
I had a headache from work and been ill recently, but ex offered no help and I tried to clean the mess from the day after tea, while ds watched cbeebies. As ds was bored as ex had stuck him in front of the TV all.day, he understandably wanted my attention. I was so stressed. Couldn't take ds out as temporary medical problem means I can't carry him. Cue complete meltdown for me and ds, I'm normally quite patient but I just couldn't cope with needy ds and filthy chaos everywhere in my small.house, there wasn't even anywhere to sit.
I hate ex, he left without giving me any help, he ignored my tears and didn't even say goodbye. he's meant to have contact.with ds tomorrow but I feel I can't bear to see him, he's such a horrible person :-(
Sorry for the rant