anyone actually get on with their ex? And admit they couldnt do it without them.

[mummyOF4darlings]

Ok so my ex (father of my youngest 3) was a crappy bf but its days like this when i know what a good man he is and so thankful that hes such a good dad to the kids. I dont know what i would do without him i know i can rely on him for anything, dont get me wrong weve had our ups and downs in the past when we broke up but its all been forgot and we are good mates.

Know its hard for some people to understand and automaticly think 1 of us is trying to get the other back but were not hes in a long term relationship and im happy with someone.

Posted this because see so many threads slagging their exs off (me included when in regards to dd) just wanted to see how many others are in same boat as you never hear the good things do you?

On the whole my ex and I get on. We are friends on fb, we can talk and have a coffee, I have his support in everything I do with the kids and can ring him about them for help anytime. Its had moments, but yes, we all get on.

We vary. He was very emotionally abusive - classic narcissist, it took me years of therapy to even see the damage he'd done/was still doing.

Now that I've "recovered", I can be civil with him and sometimes even friendly.

Sometimes I think he's a great dad - he does lot of outdoors things with them and takes them on holidays I couldn't afford, other times I can't stand his discipline techniques, especially with my ASD son.

It's me that has to "manage" the relationship between us though really. Sometimes he slips back into his old authoritarian ways and I have to put my foot down and he usually responds positively to that.

So on the whole I am grateful to have an ex like him, especially now I'm seeing what OHs ex is like and how bad life could be! :D

Partner and his ex are similar. They split up ,and initially she thought he'd come running back when she fell pregnant with someone else's child. He didn't ,and that caused major tension but now ,years later ,they get on well and he's always available to help ,either her or the kids. It does happen ,but unfortunately people are only really wiling to write about shit exes ,not good ones !!

Nope

He will never put himself out eg dd1 had an accident and needed to go to a&e, he lives 2 streets away and was home from work but would he have dd2 so I didn't have to manage 2 of them at a&e?
Would he bollocks!

Having said that, a good friend if mine has a really good relationship with her ex -they even go on holiday with their new partners and respective children like one big happy family which I find a bit odd but if it works for them!

I would say we couldn't do it without each other

We've had our ups and downs too, OP, but I can rely on him to stick to the rota, but apply common sense if it needs to be changed for a child focussed reason (works both ways) and when I hear of some of my friends stuck in part time work or baring the brunt of all the child care costs, I appreciate that I can work late 2 or three times a week and that my career hasn't really suffered as a consequence of our split.

He also does a lot of the active stuff with DD, like swimming and running around. I'm more about reading and cuddling and socialising so if he weren't in the picture I'd be outside of my comfort zone having to provide those experiences for her.

Its nice to hear positive stories :)

I agree it is good to hear some positives. although I don't forgive how/what happened to our marriage throughout ex and I put our 2 dds at the forefront. we are both flexible about contact and we do support each other re discipline etc. only 6 months in but so far so good.

I get on v well with my ex. We never change arrangements , he sometimes has them extra, or one at a time, over and above what we've agreed, so they get quality time with each of us. He Will come For Sunday lunch once a month, or he'll cook for me, eg on Mother's Day.
We still hug and can chat on for ages about the kids.
I've met someone else, he hasn't. It's been 18 months. Helps the kids to see we still get on.

My ex had an affair, screwed me emotionally and started exerting his power when we split and the affair became public.

We've now been split for 14 months. We are both single and co-parent perfectly. He was a shit dad when we were together but truly amazing now. We are both very flexible with one another and swap days, do errands etc if one of us is ill.

We can bear to be in the same room and will chat like friends etc about random things, but we don't socialise together.

Bananasandnutella - its great youve felt you can move on your story is similar to mine. We dont really socialise either but we are very chatty, and chat on fb by commenting on statuses and pics etc. If i need a lift somewhere and hes available (if its something for the kids anyway) i know i can rely on him for help