When/ how to introduce a new boyfriend

[Benzalkonium]

Hi everyone,I am looking for experiences here...

I have just started seeing someone, and we have agreed no telling family yet. However, things are progressing well, andwe are keen to spend as much time together as possible... His ex's access time is different from my ex's access time, so is logistically tricky.

My first thought was introduce to kids/ family at the same time if we are still serious in 2 or 3 months.....

BUT his kids are teens and already spotted he's seeing someone, and if we are going to get any time together it would be handier to tell his kids, and spend time at his place, while my ( younger) kids are at their dads... But if his kids know, all our families (who are friends) will know pretty quick, and is it realistic to keep it from my kids?

Feel like this is a total minefield!

Any experience good or bad?

Fwiw we are both committed to being together.... But early stages

I do think when there are older children around you have to be honest and say "I'm seeing someone but it's early days and I don't want you to meet them until I'm sure about the relationship."

Younger children might find this hard to understand and it's also difficult for them to comprehend fairly long times. So it's easier not to mention it. I think it's difficult when they're in between and don't understand why they might have to wait but will probably twig what's going on.

Thanks for that, Bertie botts, I think that's exactly why I'm struggling a bit to work it out.

Well things are moving forward for us...

I met up with some family members, and while its easy not to mention it on the phone it's different when you see them! So we are telling family now.

I have also met his children, just briefly. They know we are seeing each other, and it seemed to go well. So far.

So I'm in the position I didn't want to be in now really ie: lots of people know except my ex and my kids. I'll keep you posted in case anyone's wondering.

I think I am going to see him for a couple of hours at the weekend if I can organise someone for the kids. Then I will tell them that I am going to the pub for a drink with John. I don't go to the pub that much, but I have been a couple of times recently with a girlfriend so hopefully it will seem kind of normal to them.