My ex left me when I wouldn't have an abortion. All sorts of horrible things have been said and he will not talk to me at all. His mental state is unstable which he now has tablets for and supposed to be going for counselling. He smokes marijuana every day (not much but still smokes it) and at one point was doing a bag of coke every night. His personality is very volatile to say the least and I was always scared to bring up any difficult conversation for fear he would fly off the handle. I have been through hell and back with his nightmare of an ex. She stopped access when he started seeing me. Her and her kids vandalised my property several times. There was an accusation of child abuse but she didn't involve social services. He never puts the child to bed at a reasonable time and she has no routine at either home. He feeds her crap. That was another thing that did my head in. The ex called the shots he would find it hard to say no to her if she asked him to have her extra hours etc. Ii fully encouraged him to have his child as much as possible. One of his older children went through some stuff, drug abuse, stealing etc. I feel like I have sorted every problem out for him as he couldn't seem to step up.
I admit I have stayed in the relationship a lot longer than I probably should have. I am fully prepared to bring up baby alone but now I am away from the situation I can see how destructive and unstable he is. I am worried when the baby is born that he will try for access. I honestly feel that even if this man stops the drugs, sorts his head out that he would make an appalling role model. No one can change that much and he would still have a mean temper. He would shout and go crazy no matter whos kids were around. Added to that his appalling routine for child he has already.
In an ideal world every child should know its father but I think this one is an exception.
Please can I have some advice?