Thank you for letting me know about your full family life.(a bit of a rant!)

[LetZygonsbeZygons]

Didn't know how else to phrase title!

Now, I don't begrudge anyone being happy or having a full family, but when a 'friend' is telling me how she had a 'slight' cold over xmas and her DH did everything in the house- the dinner, looking after the DCs, bringing her soup, running a bath, telling her to stay in bed,and her friend bought her a lovely expensive piece of jewelry for xmas.....

I had a streaming cold, I couldn't afford anything over a fiver for her (but the thought was there),and no one, let me stress NO ONE, no DH/DP/any other family or friend /no respite ever to help me. I had to get out of bed and do everything myself as DC cant manage anything.

Id give anything to stay in bed and have someone look after DC and me. to make the food and see to DCs disabilities and needs.

Yes, Im jealous, yes, a wee bit bitter, and yes she KNOWS Im alone with no help and feels free to rub it in.

Hate being alone. (sorry, just needed to unburden).

Mate, I can only sympathise. Christmas wasn't a huge load of work for me but boy was it lonely- I spent it on my own with DS (13 yo). I just made the mistake of checking out Facebook and spent the last few minutes looking at photos of my brother enjoying a lovely family Christmas with his wife, their two DDs and his sister-in-law's family. I really wish I hadn't looked, but I couldn't resist.

I'm sure your friend didn't mean to rub it in, but I agree it's incredibly insensitive. People just don't get it. At least it's all over now for another year and I really hope next year will be better for us all. XX

Thanks. I just don't like being without a partner and that another years gone and theres no one around.

I love me and DC being a 'team', itd just be nice to have someone around!

and apart from this 'friend', no one else we know has bothered to ask after us, theyre too busy with their full families! so not feeling very festive!

FBs a nightmare, I never go on FB or tweet anyone!

I understand what you mean - I'm another for whom Xmas wasn't loads of work (my DC are 15 and 12) but it is lonely. I don't have any family other than them. My friends are all off with their families so don't bother contacting me. It's shit, but at least it's nearly over for another year!

ITs almost like someone already well off winning the lottery and you try to be glad for them but meanwhile you're struggling to make ends meet!

DCs hard work but has her 'quiet' moments which is when I can relax a bit (like right now shes reading the argos catalogue -all the books she got for xmas and shes back to her fave! (shes autistic and likes routine)) so that gives me 'me'time to socialise here on mn.
at least we're all friends here so we're not forgotten here!

these blasted xmas adverts don't help do they??????????

What gets me is the amount of whingeing that these people do. If they're not whingeing then they're boasting in a vomit-inducing way. Methinks me needs to unfriend some people, no? ;-)

sorry you are not well..It is soooo hard when you have a little one...I think that is the hardest time as a LP... I also think Christmas doe exacerbate the family thing if none are around...

I now like my Christmas's my Ds and me..We have out own traditions and things we do..now he is at school it is nice just to spend quality time with him.

Hope you feel better soon and like another poster said your friend probably doesn't get it

Ugh crap isn't it?

Ds had chicken pox this week. I did get a break as he went to his dad's on Xmas day. It has been very rough and lonely. I feel like ds has had a crap time and I haven't been looking after him as well as I would if there was someone else here.

In real life, every parent I know, even other lone parents, are coupled up. I'm very grateful for MN so I know I'm not the only one.

Season of goodwill, pah! My tip, ignore, ignore, ignore (especially where fb concerned. Here follows my second self-indulgent post of the evening but hell, it's made me all the more determined to face 2014 with a "take no shit" attitude. This was the first year DCs have spent Xmas with ex since we split 6 years ago and I spent it on my own, literally on my tod not drinking too much wine. One fb friend (albeit one I have known since childhood and our families are still in touch) did not approve and rather than saying so to my face/wall proceeded to slag me off with her sister on her wall about how I was a bitch, freak and "no fuckin real woman would want to be anywhere without her kids, especially at Xmas". I cried for two days then thought sod 'em, real friends do not make you feel like shit deliberately, fb posts are not real (how many people really post about how utterly crap things are but if their lives are that great, wish them well and know you deserve that too and if their lives are crap, embrace what you have got and TF you don't have that crap to put up with).

Most certainly did KingRollo, I didn't even dignify them with a response as I presume an intelligent argument would have been lost on them .

good for you happy.

I get the opposite ''you 'smother' your DC you never let anyone else have her'' etc etc.

erm- there IS no one else around, and instead of bitching why don't YOU offer to have her for 15 mins and see how hard it is? FFS.

I am sorry you are unwell and have no help. I am lucky in that I have family but when times were difficult and I needed some respite I didn't always get it from them but from my friends. Have you ever asked your friends to have the kids for a bit? I happily have my friends kids.

happy what a fucking bitch your friend was and surely she can see your children might want to have a xmas with their dad. Sorry you spent it on your own though and hope you consumed loads of lovely wine and food in the peace and quiet.

I always quite like it when they start whinging about their partners because it reminds me why I stay single. None of that bollocks!

Happy New Year x

thing is DC has very complex needs that no one can meet and friends, even thought hey don't mind her being around their kids when Im there, they cant 'trust' DC alone with their dcs. (understandable, DC needs constant watching, shes jeckyl and hyde).

I'm in the same boat and yes, you are perfectly entitled to let of steam

Fail. I meant let off steam. It is hard never having the luxury of being ill, and FB is the worst place to look

And I have to say, parts of Mn are best avoided too I liked your analogy of lottery winning.

There will of course be someone along to tell you that not all families are happy and it's better to be alone than in a bad relationship , blah de blah.

But you are perfectly entitled to feel the way you do