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Original poster

Can I move area without ex P's consent?

12 replies

theeverydaydancer · 07/12/2013 21:13

I have a 2 year old DD with my ex. We separated when I was pregnant and tbh he has on the whole been a massive arse toward me since he found out I was pregnant. Since July this year he has had more contact with my DD however.

I really want to move to another area (about 3 hour drive away) but I don't know if ex would be able to legally stop me if he didn't want me to go. I haven't discussed it with him yet. His name is on the birth certificate so I think this means he has parental responsibility.

Does anyone have any experience of this?

OP posts:

SundaySimmons · 08/12/2013 00:11

I moved nearly three hundred miles away. There wasn't anything my ex could so.

However you may have to meet him halfway or take your daughter down or him for visits as well as him coming to you.

Do bear in mind that it will mean your daughter staying away more to visit him as a day visit is out of the question if it's a six hour round trip.

mumtobealloveragain · 08/12/2013 00:45

Well yes he can try and stop you. He can apply to court for a prohibited steps order. You'd then have to go to court and a judge would decide whether or not you would be allowed to move your daughter 3 hrs away.

All factors will be considered, his argument against it and your argument for it. You need to give reasons why it is better for your daughter to move, why it is in her best interests.

How much contact does he have? If he sees her just every other weekend for example, there's no real reason you couldn't move her as it wouldn't affect his contact , although you'd probably have to offer to do the driving. If he sees her more regularly, frequently and your move will affect their relationship then he has more of a case to win at Court.

Monetbyhimself · 08/12/2013 10:57

As long as your move isn't solely designed to restrict his contact, and you are moving for better homes, family support, jobs, schooling etc and can arrange regular contact with her dad, then the courts (if it got thar far) won't stop you.

sutekidane · 08/12/2013 11:02

You might have to meet him halfway and his travel costs could affect your child maintenance if you get any from him. I agree with pp you might find she stays over more as a the journey affects their contact. Or you might find he gives up completely on your dd if the move puts too many barriers in his way because of money etc.

dobedobedo · 08/12/2013 11:17

Freedom of movement within the UK is classed as a human right so he can't stop you. I moved from one country in the UK to another and ex tried to stop me but was unable as we were staying in the uk. We came to a new access agreement (half terms and holidays etc) which works for us. And my life is so much easier without ex's wife causing trouble all the time. I'd contact a solicitor if I were you just for some advice, so you're seen to be reasonable to him if that makes sense.

CheckedPjs · 08/12/2013 12:31

Just don't tell him to after you moved. Simples :)

HRHLadyG · 08/12/2013 12:34

Move and then write to let him know. He may try to be difficult but its unlikely that he can do anything. If you were moving out of the EU he may have a case...... enjoy your fresh start! x

mumtobealloveragain · 08/12/2013 23:17

Hang on! OP some of the advice here is incorrect!

True he cannot stop all YOU moving but he absolutely can stop you taking your daughter with you if he applies to Court and gains a Prohibited Steps Order.

I'm sure lots of people here have moved and their ex either hasn't stopped them because they haven't bothered to apply to Court or because they applied and lost. That happens of course.

You haven't said how much contact he has. This is massively relevant. If it's only every other weekend I bet he'd not get a Court to agree and order to stop you taking your daughter.

lostdad · 09/12/2013 13:26

My ex did this with our DS. She told me via her solicitor she was moving 300 miles away. She did this to me to stop him seeing me and I moved too - I'm now 20 miles down the road while her `support network' is on the other side of the country.

Can he stop you legally? He can seek a Prohibited Steps Order which can in theory do this.

But would doing so be in the best interests of your child? Really? If you have to move there's no reason why you can't agree something with your DD's father.

mumtobealloveragain - `This is massively relevant. If it's only every other weekend I bet he'd not get a Court to agree and order to stop you taking your daughter.

It has no bearing on the situation more than anything else about the best interests of the child.

Would advise the OP to seriously consider whether this is in her DD's best interests and for God's sake don't poison whatever relationship you may have with your ex because in all likelihood your DD will be the one who suffers.

makemineapinot · 19/12/2013 23:43

My ex took out a prohibited steps order and took it all the way. I had to prove standard of living, water quality, schooling, sanitation etc even tho it was a move within the UK. If I had been moving with dc within England and Wales it would gave been easier but I was taking the dc out with the jurisdiction of the English and Welsh courts which made it ridiculous. In the end I got a barrister who told the magistrates that as an EU citizen it was my human rights to live where I wanted within the EEC so they denied his PSO. Not sure his that would stand in a county court with a legally trained judge cos in my honest opinion when things went to magistrates anything could happen! But within uk they would have to have a big case against you especially if it's in best interests of children. My ex at the time was applying to live down under but still had to thwart me! Twat!

bluebeardsbabe · 27/12/2013 23:00

If moving means a better quality of life for you, more support etc then do it. Imoved far away from non supportive ex with baby and could not have done it had I not been closer to my family. we have a much better life here. Exp occasionally moans about me 'taking dd' away from him but really has never lifted a finger to do anything for her. In my opinion you, as the main caregiver, needs a good, stable environment, wherever that may be. My dd will be happy because I am happy as well as know who her father is through sporadic contact with him (his choice).

Sorry. Not much advice here. Just a bit of moral support.

DarkKnight123 · 28/12/2013 00:02

As a first step I think you ought to discuss this with your dtr's father. He is a parent too. It may be that you can work out access arrangments with shared travel, or perhaps he would want the chance to also move to be near his child. Yes, he may go to court, but that's his right. Your daughter is the important one and if you seriousely think it would be in her best interests then bite the bullet and be honest and upfront about it.

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