Dear Santa. Can I have a daddy for xmas? Can mummy have a husband?

[LetZygonsbeZygons]

That's what I heard DC saying today as she was writing her Dear Santa letter.

Shes never known a dad, the b*** that was supposed to be buggered off after a year of abusing both of us.(in every way).

didn't put me off guys though, but its been 13 years and ive never even had a date nor has DC had a decent male role model (ive got no brothers etc).

shes happy in our 'team', but every xmas/birthday that's what she asks for.

and even though shes happy enough on xmas day it breaks my heart that theres no guy there to share xmas with (and rest of year). or new years.

I don't go on about being lonely for guy in front of her or anything, but theres nowhere and no way to meet anyone anyway (and I wont go down the internet dating thing, that's not me) and I never get to go out anyway as she has disabilities and im fulltime with her. and no help.

how do we get through another xmas? I try and make it as fun as poss, but her wish is always there.

sorry, just wanted to unburden. its not a good time of year.

Oh God I really sympathise! Seriously though... who needs men? If I was you, I'd turn her into a little feminist and make sure she knows that women don't need men. We don't need someone to objectify us that we have to spend our days cooking for. Yeah sure there are some decent guys around but not many! I'd try & put that idea out of her mind using sociological ideas of women's wonderfulness...

Sounds possibly like you need to widen your social circle and include some men in there. Easier said than done but I'm in a similar boat and that's my own aim. Good luck!!!!!

Mother im not a feminist at all.(Aarrgh, what am I doing on mumsnet????.)

I like to love and be loved, need and be needed.

having said that Im fiercly independent, as Ive HAD to be most of my life so I am self sufficient and stuff, but id like a guy that likes cooking! I hate cooking!

id like a decent guy in my life, I don't miss out as such, im happy with DC and she with me, but I would like someone else, mainly for love, proper love,(not abuse,) and companion- ship and stuff.

I do have friends but feel a bit left out as theyre all married, not that that's the reason I want a guy, but YKWIM.

someone to massage my tired shoulders, run a bath, bring me tea, (and Id do same for him), talk adult conversation at night and be romantic when DC in bed, and feel protected....

Im the proverbial knight in shining armour type!

but I do try and instill in DC that were a team and we're okay. besides i'd find it very hard to share her, we're so close.

thanks for replying btw!