try to talk when it is calm, ask him how he would like to be supported,
Make him earn privileges, use of screens, if he is kind, and toes the line he gets privileges for the next day, if he is not, then he stays in, no TV no computer, no phone.
Set some agreements, when it is calm,
Try to get across to him that all teens feel bereft, stressed, out of sorts, and wrenched, it's normal,
but he has to be kind and respectful to everyone, and work on his coping strategies, he must find was to process without lashing out.
Ask him if he enjoys feeling like this, be honest about how it makes you feel,(they find it hard to find the empathy with in) so don't plead for mercy.
Ask what helps, ask what doesn't. explain you must work together to find a balance.
And be kind to yourselves.
Hormones are vile, explain he won't always feel this way, it's just a matter of riding the storm,
not getting frustrated by the big picture, and he can do anything he wants, he just as to do all the little steps to get there like handing work in ,asking for help, you don't leap to the top of a mountain you get there one step at a time with lots of rests to take in the view,
He is bound to be overwhelmed and it is frightening, to feel out of control.
and get help, anyone he respects or likes, bring into the tag team,
Honestly they do turn lovely again, but it is a tough decade.