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Original poster

Feeling reaaly down..should I call my ex to see how unhappy he is?

6 replies

Narabug01 · 27/08/2013 18:12

Feeling really down today and have done for a few weeks now. am considering phoning ex to see how miserable he is and seeing if there might be a chance of reconciliation? Would this be a stupid thing to do?

OP posts:
Sasquatch75 · 27/08/2013 18:58

:( under what circumstances did you split, and how long ago?

Original poster
Narabug01 · 28/08/2013 07:09

Split jan this year but hadn't been getting on for about 3 years. He then met someone else while we were having a trial separation and admitted to sleeping with her. I then filed for divorce in july.
It has all happened so quickly it is just making me really down.
I feel like i have ruined our family - we have 2 dds.
Not sure how he feels about it as we only ever exchange unpleasant comments when we are together to look after the children which is only briefly.
I am thinking of getting some anti depressants from thedoctor to help me get through.

OP posts:
Lonecatwithkitten · 28/08/2013 07:50

Firstly there must have been underlying problems for you to separate in the first place and he must of felt that it was over to see someone else. So no I don't think phoning him will help.
Are there hobbies maybe you always wanted to do that you could start? I made a plan for my new life, ExH hated me knitting ( said it made me old!) I started doing that again and took up crochet to fill those long evenings. I joined a choir made new friends who only knew me as a single mum.
Once I got busy the terrible awful sadness lessened.

Original poster
Narabug01 · 28/08/2013 07:59

Thanks sounds like really good advise - i always wanted to knit too...and got the same reaction from ex! Also always wanted to do photography so will look out for a class.
Good idea.
Yes there were big problems b4 we split and it did feel liberating when he left. My sadness is for the life we could have had 2gether. I think i am mourning the loss of the family life i thought i was going to have!

OP posts:
Lonecatwithkitten · 28/08/2013 08:34

You have this wonderful chance to make a lovely new life see it as that.
Look at your local knitting shop they often run one day courses to get you started at knitting, again you will meet new people who didn't know you in your old life.

Original poster
Narabug01 · 28/08/2013 08:51

Yes you are right. I can now be and do things i want. I need to look forward positively. Will look up choirs abd knitting!
Thanks for the advise x feeling better already

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