Need to rant and rave.

[Lonecatwithkitten]

Back story ExH had affair with OW left for her she is alcoholic (currently has 3 year driving ban - 1st offence). ExH has accepted that OW caring for DD is unacceptable as there is significant risk she will be drunk.
I work ft as does ExH, so holiday club is necessary. To try and break it up for DD I went to huge effort finding mix of dance, netball, survival and multi activity camps. ExH's working hours are 8am to 5pm he refuses to make any kind of flexible work application to take DD to and from school. In past he has taken a chance I would not find out leaving DD with OW. We have 50:50 care.
So to prevent this I have agreed to help out with drop offs and pick ups so DD can go to more specialist events which are 9 to 4.
The other Tuesday he was over an hour late collecting DD meaning I had to do clinic with her there and then cancel an appointment after clinic. On Monday he texted at 8.30am to ask if I would take DD to camp. So I wrote a firm e-mail saying it was only courtesy that as I was helping him out he a) ask in advance and b) be on time. Yes of course he said.
Tonight yet again he is nearly 45 mins late - it really is water off a ducks back.

What an arse. It makes me wish there was some sort of consequence for screwing your child around. He knows he can do it because he knows you will pick up the slack and actually ensure your dd is looked after.

it must confirm why you split up. He's that womans problem now, lucky you for getting away!

I would tell him that 50/50 only works if he is able to commit to caring for her and getting her where she needs to be when its his 50%

If he can't then it would be better if he has her fewer days and gives you more maintenance in return (at least during the holidays if that's the only time its problematic) so that you can afford the childcare on those extra days, knowing that she will be there and collected on time. Its not fair on her to be messed around.

Long story, but laughing at maintenance.

In his words as 'you earn the money you should pay me'. What and provide all her school clothes, trips and school fees. Don't be a successful woman in business and get divorce.

Sad thing is, the only way he will learn is not to keep bailing him out, but the only person to suffer then is DD.

Its a tricky one but I think you need to be firmer about not helping him, making sure you are too busy to help out at short notice so that he HAS to make alternative arrangements. He needs to realise that his responsibility for his half of his DD's care can't be passed off onto you whenever it suits him. Its unprofessional for you and unfair on your DD for her to end up attending work with you because he has let her down.