Anyone else hate packing for the dcs to go on holiday with their dad?

[chickensaladagain]

I feel like I've spent all week washing, ironing, telling them they can't wear stuff cause they need it for their holidays

Making sure they have got enough shampoo, shower gel and new this year, razors and tampons!

Telling dd1 she needs to reduce the amount of makeup she could take

They are camping so making sure they've got enough stuff to keep them occupied

And I'm not even going

He will waltz up to the door at lunch time with it all ready and whisk them away, then in 1 week he will deposit them back on my doorstep with bags of stuff that needs washing/ ironing and putting away again

Something not right about that somewhere

My daughter has just returned from a holiday with her Dad where I had to send all the clothles etc including spending money, he did get suncream or correction his mum did, he then returned her Friday with everything for me to wash, put away etc.

The way I tried to look at it was at least I knew she had everything she needed!!!LOL.

I'm going the same now. Ds is 2.5.

I know he will enjoy it but I don't know what I'll Dow other myself

Your DCs are old enough to use razors and tampons - surely they can do their own packing?

My DD (12) has been sorting out her own stuff for her Dads for a couple of years now; yes there were a few hiccups to start with and she had to do without, but all I do is give her a few reminders and it's taught her loads!

Leave them to it, sit down and enjoy a

They can dobtheirbiwn laundry when they get back, too - it won't kill them!

I agree with China! DSis and I used to pack our own stuff - we could ask DM to look it over of course and she would but we did it ourselves.

At 12 I would rather she's out playing with her friends than spending her 1 week of the summer holidays at home doing the ironing -I work so holidays are split between various family members

Plus if anything is forgotten it will be me that gets it in the neck from their dad, not them
Rucksacks, sleeping bags and other camping gear is all stored in the loft so I get it all out for them

Yep. Mine is away at the moment. Everything gets carefully organised and packed (by me) and my pet hate is that he will return the case with everything ending up needing washing.

No matter how much gentle prodding, he never bothers to keep the dirty stuff separate from the clean grrrrr. (Have to pack more than she needs due to it being a UK holiday and there could be four seasons in one day!)

I try to look at the postives, she'll have a great time, it's a weeks childcare sorted out, I'm in control of the telly for once lol, but miss her so much - roll on the dirty washing coming home!!

Razors and tampons definitely old enough to organise own packing. DD is 9 and has to lay the clothes she wants on her bed ready and then I help her pack. She has to think about clothes the weekend before she goes and then it is up to her if she wears it it doesn't go.
As far as special stuff if Ex is going somewhere that requires extra gear that is his choice and he has to organise it end of.

My 9 & 11 year old DDs pack for themselves. Depending on what they are doing, I'll make suggestions, and I give them a 'final day' warning to get stuff in the wash by. They also sort out washbags etc. They know what they use everyday.

I fear you are doing too much OP. Foster their independence!

Ironing for a camping trip?

Yes, you need to teach her to pack, my 12y is pretty good. 15y old has done most of her packing for her trip off with DH although I did have to say tampons.

As for DH, I did his packing, I've done his packing for 23 years.

chicken Nothing takes the wind out of an irate ex's sails quicker than criticising their precious DC; Im really sorry the DCs didn't have x, y, or z for their trip, I did tell them to take care with their packing

You're really not doing your DD any favours by allowing her to enjoy all the benefits of growing up (out with friends etc) but not expecting her to take responsibility - at what age will you finally pull the plug and expect her to fend for herself?

China, she has chores that she has to do

More than the majority if her friends

She can cook a meal, deal with laundry, she irons her school uniform, I don't mollycoddle her

But she is a child still, out of the 6 week holiday there is only one week to see her friends, as long as her normal jobs are done then I'm not going to ask her to do extra

Her dad is a twat, if she doesn't have everything he would either bring her home or make her do without
She made sure everything was in the wash by the day I asked her to and she got out everything as I asked her for it but I'm not going to send her up into the loft to drag stuff down

He quite likes criticising her, I'm not going to give him ammunition to do it more

Ok chicken sounds like you've got it sussed - your first post made it it sound like you were their personal slave
If she can iron, launder etc, then it's your choice whether you do it for her so she can enjoy her freedom or expect her to do it; but its a bit churlish to choose to do it for her and then resent your ex for it.

I resent him for the fact that he never has to do any of the day to day stuff and gets to do the fun stuff

no dentist appointments, no checking homework has been done, no making sure they eat a balanced diet etc

he was just winding me up cause he had sent me about 10 messages saying dont forget xy&z and I just wanted to reply 'you bloody well do it'

when they come back they are off to my parents the day after for 3 days while I work -they will come home stinky and tired which is why the unpacking & washing will fall to me

I resent him for the fact that he never has to do any of the day to day stuff and gets to do the fun stuff

Yeah, they all do things that remind you why their an 'ex'!

I have the opposite problem - an over invested Daddy who insists on taking control of every aspect of DDs life; from removing my contact details from her dental records to insisting he attended her school uniform fitting!
One of the reasons I'm teaching her independence is so she can speak up for herself and tell him when she doesn't want him involved - he won't listen to me!

Don't iron for camping. Take tee shorts etc that just need folding.m