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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Original poster

Just another moan .....

8 replies

friendlymum67 · 27/07/2013 19:20

Been a single parent for 9 years now, so pretty much used to it, my DF died 5 years ago and now my best friend has moved to Scotland this weekend.

I feel so lost without her here, we've known each other a long time, we were neighbours first, then friends and we've been thro a lot together but she's got her own (new) life to live now with husband and kids.

I have other friends here but none that I am as close to - I feel so down about it - its hard enough being a single parent but this has really compounded how isolating it is Sad

To make matters worse, I don't think she feels it as bad as me, which is understandable as she's got family around her and a new life.

Sorry for the moan - I am just feeling very sorry for myself at the mo.

OP posts:
Holliewantstobehot · 27/07/2013 19:27

Really feel for you - i am a lone parent and if my dsis moved away i would be devastated. I find being a single parent isolating too. I have no good advice for u just wanted to offer u hugs!

Original poster
friendlymum67 · 27/07/2013 19:31

Thanks Hollie - really appreciate your hugs. Part of me wants to slap myself and get over it, but I just feel like crying x

OP posts:
Holliewantstobehot · 27/07/2013 20:16

Have a good cry and let it out - here's my shoulder. I would - it won't change things but it might help u. It's not a small thing it's a big thing and i expect that once she has settled in she will really miss u too. Its always easier to be the one to leave than the one to stay. Will u keep in touch?

Original poster
friendlymum67 · 28/07/2013 00:47

Seen updates on her facebook page - everyone wishing them well Sad. I have to be realistic and move on - we've said we'll keep in touch but time will tell ......

Thanks so much for listening Thanks

OP posts:
ShinyBlackShoes · 28/07/2013 12:34

It is really hard being an LP in terms of emotional support so don't feel guilty for feeling sorry for yourself...I am having one of those moments right now.
Usually I am fine but in times of crisis not having someone to talk to, bounce ideas off, provide a shoulder to cry on, or tell you to stop being daft, is difficult.
You will be fine though, just hang on in there a d willow for as long as you need to...sometimes we need that

Holliewantstobehot · 28/07/2013 14:07

Shiny - you are so right. Doing it all alone in a physical sense is tiring but doable. It is the emotional side that is exhausting and until you've done it you don't realise how much it takes out of you psychologically. I find the weight of responsibility overwhelming sometimes but all u can do is keep going. At least we can all support each other here.

Original poster
friendlymum67 · 28/07/2013 22:17

Shiny - I'm sorry you're having a difficult time at the moment.

What you said sums it up exactly! I am pretty sure that if I had a DH I wouldn't be feeling it so much. As I said before we had been thro so much together and she knows me so well - which is what a DH/P would be normally be in the position of.

I am very good at holding it all together 99% of the time, but it is exhausting emotionally and mentally and this has knocked me backwards.

Thanks again both of you for listening and supporting x

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 29/07/2013 00:26

i think it will do you good to have a good cry about it and grieve for a lost/changed friendship. losing a close friend to distance is difficult. it is not the same, even if you keep in touch. it is hard to find friends when you are a single parent. it is not easy/impossible to go out in the evenings.

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