3 year old DS is asking questions

[mummytolucas411]

My DS has never met his father (he decided to leave midway through pregnancy). I knew it would happen eventually.. today DS out of the blue, having never mentioned his father before, asked me "Is my daddy dead?"

It took me by surprise and I told him no to which he replied "Is he very far away?" I said yes to that but of course he will be asking more questions soon. What am I supposed to say?

Just tell him the truth that sometimes mummies and daddies don't live together because they don't get along .
You could say that you love him more than a mummy and daddy put together and that he is very special to you.
That might get you down the line a bit until he is old enough to get the full story?

I would try and make it easy to talk about as young as poss eg in the coming weeks if feels right to try to speak naturally about this just so not only is he clear he can ask questions freely but also can see that it is ok so I agree reassuring him how much he is loved is very important. You could say something like some people live with mummies, some with daddies etc and that the most important thing is being loved and looked after by someone special

A good idea I read on here is something like, "Some daddies are not very good at being daddies. But I love being a mummy and I'm very good at it, aren't I?"

I think it's a fine balance to be honest with them (very important obviously) but also avoid scaring them that they might lose you too.

He might be curious to see a photo if you have one or hear a few details about him. Or he might not, just make sure he knows he can ask.