Holiday access

[tootsweets]

Please could you tell me your arrangements? My ex is saying he will have our 4 children for a week at Easter, a week at Christmas and a week in the summer. Is this usual? Comments please
No idea new to this!

sounds better than my ex's arrangement which is "youre their full time guardian so il have them as normal every other weekend during the summer holidays/christmas etc" says hes not got 50/50 residence so why should he just as its the holidays he doesnt have 50/50 because of school so i assumed he would jump at the chance to see them more but no

sounds really good to me maybe 2 weeks in the summer holidays if he would like to the more quality time he can spend with them the better imo

There's no fixed pattern. Some will split all school holidays 50:50, others will stick to existing contact schedules, others will fit somewhere in-between.

What do you think about his proposal?

I would prefer 2 weeks in the summer!
But understand he only gets 4 weeks leave a year.
He has them every other weekend 9am Saturday until 6 pm Sunday at the moment.

Sounds good to me.

But I am in the same boat as above poster, xp never

sees DS in the holidays. Just sticks too the eow arramgemet (unless he has gone away with his new family!).

Dsis and her xp share the school holidays 50/50.

He lives 23 miles away and has had no job or transport for the past two years. I have therefore had no maintenance and as he lives at his mum and stepdad's he hasn't been able to have them overnight. He now has a full time job and therefore it's all change!
He will have them alternate weekends throughout the holidays and yes 3 weeks of his leave will be spent with our 4 children and his new partner and her 2 children.

SchmaltzingMatilda, that is what my ex is doing. I asked what his plans are for his leave during the year and he likes to keep it vague - he'll see him "as much as possible." So far he hasn't had him any extra during his leave/bank holidays and has actually been missing days (and not making them up) as he's gone away. I wonder if all the holiday childcare will fall to me once he starts school.

On the one hand, I'm ok with it as he was abusive to me and I see small signs of him trying to manipulate ds so I feel limited contact is for the best. However, ds loves him and I find it sad how he doesn't prioritise him over having a life.

It isn't a nice situation to be in and in an ideal world I would have them all the time.
But they need to see him and I get so exhausted.

DP's court order was made when his DD was 3. He was granted a week at Christmas, a week at Easter, three weeks in the summer and three half terms out of six over a two year rotation - so 50% of all school hols. They even fixed the dates so we didn't have to wait for his ex to decide which week she would allow DD to visit.

the ideal arrangement would probably be that he looks after the children for half of their school holidays.
Ex chooses not to, as it means he has to sort childcare as OW needs her childfree holidays

How do you feel about his proposals ? (Remember they are only proposals and you have the right to NOT agree to them if they don't suit the kids)

Feels fair. I'm not working at the moment but fully intend to as soon as youngest starts school in September.
As he only gets 4 weeks leave, it makes him having the children more difficult.
It sounds like he is being fair compared to what others have told me.