i need hints and tips, really badly. i dont know what it is, im just not coping very well at the moment. worse in fact than when dd was newborn. my house is a disaster area, housework is impossible with a 2 1/2 year old (not an uncommon problem i know) but there's also decorating and the garden to be done, plus work three days a week. dd's tantrums make any task last an hour. im so stressed and feel physically ill. ive got my 9 year old ds asking me why our house isnt as tidy as his friend's house (who has one school age child and a partner). im trying to explain but i dont seem to get anywhere.
my main problem at the moment is other people's kids and thats where i need ideas mostly. my garden is the local playarea it seems. for example, ds will go out into the cul-de-sac to play or ride his bike, his female friend will come out to play. then her little sister will follow and ask to play with my dd, or her mum will ask if the little one can play with dd. i say yes, fine, in the front garden. so i have to watch them. i lock the gate so dd cant run into the road, so her friend climbs over my fence, to and fro to and fro, stamping on my flowers as she goes. i tell her not to, she ignores me. then ds's other friend sees them playing and wants to play. i cant say no as it seems really unfair when i have others here and he's a nice kid who doesnt make a nuisance of himself, i also get on really well with his mum, she's been a good friend to me. so then another neighbour's kids will want to play in my garden also and i cant exactly say no as its going to look like favoritism. so on it goes. mostly i end up with between 7 and 10 kids. if i need to do housework, i cant go in and do it. if im doing the garden, its pointless with all of them running about, kicking balls etc. they all become my responsibility when they are in my garden and i cant take it! this is nearly every day...there arent enough hours in the day as it is to get everything done. if i have so many kids in my garden, i cant even go in to put a load of washing on because you can guarantee it will be that moment one of them runs out into the road and it will be me who gets a mouthful from the parent.
the only option i can see is to ban everyone's kids from my garden. that's going to look really spiteful but is it such a bad thing to want a nice front garden, with uncrushed plants and grass which isnt a mudbath?
ds is always dropping me in it too. when he has a friend here, if her wants a snack he will get one and offer it to his friend too. fair enough. but then they leave packets and papers all over my house for me to pick up. then he will invite them for tea...arrrrrrggghhhhh. ive told him not to, he said he understands but was just trying to be polite. bless him. i know it seems im complaining about nothing but we rarely get a night to ourselves now and its driving me mad. the weather is getting better but i feel like locking myself and the kids in the house just to get some peace.
sorry for whinging, im not looking for sympathy, just ideas.