In love ! But fragile

[mrsmcv]

Have been single - no dates, no sex, no kissing, no flirting for the whole of dd's life except for first 4months when I still lived with x husband. He was violent, I left him, he took us to court endlessly til court had enough if him last July.

One of my friends, who I've known for several years, became single in July last year. In jan this year we got together. He has two young kids.

Our relationship is incredibly passionate and I love being with him. He is mad about me too. So what's the problem?

Well, I can't get past his relationship with his ex, which he says is amicable - and I know he doesn't love her, nor she him - but to me, it is unboundaried and unresolved. He feels responsible for her - she ended it, after years of unhappiness, which I saw on both sides - and he misses his children bitterly, though he sees them a lot, it isn't regular and is always at her say so. For me, she is using 'amicable' to leave him uncertain and desperate to see them at any cost. He is reluctant to make regular arrangements because he can't face the idea that he may miss a chance to see them.

Separate from this, I miss our friendship. Things between us were happier and easier before. That said, he is breathtakingly attractive and the sex is totally incredible.

So lone parents, I'm asking you for your input: this hot man wants to have lots of lovely sex with me, he likes and loves me and all I can do is look for problems

Am I going mad or is there something afoot that I'm picking up on but can't quite name? .

How old are his DC and could you put up with this long term because if the answer is no then i would call it quits but carry on shagging

It doesnt sound as though they have found the right balance yet of amicable and reasonable behaviour so it might happen but then again she might ramp up the demands if she realises you are on the scene which could make for a miserable time for you.

Nobody should expect someone to put their life on hold in case the phone rings and he is needed, it would get on my pip and i would end up resenting it.

Can they not arrange set days so he knows what he is doingand throw in a lot of flexibility if he is needed

In the face of all this, I would detach yourself a bit and take things slow.....don't expect too much and keep your options open. He may or may not be the man for you. Things will resolve itself eventually but it will take time. In the meantime, step back a bit, protect yourself, enjoy life but reset your expectations somewhat.....

I would say if this guy is well into you then just relax and enjoy it do not read too much into his ex and his relationship with her it is essential he keeps seeing his children it is perfectly natural and healthy what he is going through.

Unfort. you would just need to keep being understanding and put yourself in both their shoes to understand their feelings/transition phase don't worry these relationship breakups are a big deal to the parties concerned and your patience would be needed. I would say there is no need to be insecure, for as long as the ex of his has no issue with you being with him and isn't trying to get back with him - then there is no problem whatsoever....!

I hope you find happiness with him and it all works out for you.