I am a single mother of a 2 year old. The father ran away when the child was 3 months old. When the child was 14 months old, I received court papers demanding access. I have never stopped access, but my guess is that he did not want to explain why he ran away. We went to court and I agreed to access at a contact centre for 2 hours every fortnight. Contact then progressed and is currently 3 hours every fortnight at a soft play area.
Our child is now 2 years old. There is a contact review due in court next month. The child's father never contacts me in between visits to check on the child's welfare. However, today I received a call from the father asking about the child's welfare. Then he told me that he was calling to tell me that he thinks we should tell our solicitors that we can work out contact arrangements between ourselves, so that we do not have to go to court next month. He is financially secure, so court costs are not a problem for him.
I agreed to think about it, but I do not trust him. I suspect that he is trying to take the case out of court so that he will run away again. He never wants to see the child for any longer that the court order states, even though I have asked him several times. He says that he would rather just stick with the 3 hours contact that the judge ordered, but the court order also states that contact can be increased by us at any time.
I love our child dearly, but I am genuinely tired of having to do all the work by myself 7 days a week. How can the father take me to court for contact, yet only want to look after his child for 3 hours a fortnight?
Can you please advise me on:
a. Whether I should agree to taking the issue out of court?
b. Examples of how much more time I can reasonably expect/ask him to look after his own child? (he works 9-5 Monday to Friday).
c. Does anybody have experience of what a judge is likely to order as the next steps for contact?
Thank you. I really appreciate all of your help.