Commuting children to school

[Mabon1]

My ex is very bullish about our 6 year old commuting to his house during the school week. Every Monday our son commutes a 45 mile round trip and then 28 miles on Tuesday
I think our son should be at home during the school week and be allowed to settle and avoid car journeys. What can I do to change this as I am unable to negotiate anything with him and also am I just being unreasonable?

How long does the journey take him? 23 miles to school up the motorway is very different from across London.

I think LAs usually reckon up to an hour on a bus (each way) is acceptable for primary aged kids - any longer than that would be a bit of an ordeal I would have thought. Presumably you're only way of reducing it would be for your DS to stay at your ex's a bit less - could he pick him up from school on a Monday, take him out to tea and drop him back at yours instead?

Agree with Purpleroses it's not the miles but the time taken that is important for this. Does it mean he gets home late and misses out on something?

People often have their kids commute far longer distances to get into their school of choice, don't they?

To change it, you'd have to show that the difference would not just be better for DS, but that the advantages gained would outweigh the disruption of the change PLUS giving up time with a parent. I think that would be tough to do, TBH. Plus it may seem like a long commute for a 6 year old but a court process would take quite a while, kids get older all the time...

Could you try suggesting mediation and offer a palatable compromise? Do the long commute every other week but balance this out with extra time with Dad during holidays?

My DS is slightly older and gets really tiered during the week I can only think that commuting would make things worse - I like the idea suggested that your ex could pick him up and take him out for tea and to do something and drop him back at yours?