son wants to share care.

[smileyforest]

Ok....EA ex H. Trying to divorce .... being awkward about it.
2 boys 14y 16y...
14yo lives with Dad.....comes to me at w/e....16y old with me .....does not het on very well with Dad.
I have always been worried about 14yo boy living with Dad...he isnt very sociable.......(Dad)...but my boys decision as he wanted to be at local School to where his Dad lives.....(been there a year +)
Tonight he has said he does miss me and wants to be with me more...misses his brother and family..... so I have suggested that we try living alternate weeks....(he wont leave his Dad completely).....
Just want to pose this question....
I earn slightly more than ex....I get no tax credits...he does..
He does not support his older son....I have always supported both boys....(financially)...I'm not on mega money...I'm a Nurse....
So how will he be effected financially...if my son wants to live 50%...with me??....it does annoy me that he dosen't support his eldest son...but he thinks he does not have to.... he has been to Japan x2 in 6 months to see GF...so cant be skint!
When we parted...sold house ...he received more....both have a mortgage now...
Opinions please :)) x

Any comments? Advice?

Think you need to sit down all together & discuss things.

From a purely practical perspective, if your DS dad is in receipt of benefits for him, that can continue - under the current system, in 50:50 arrangements one parent is still the primary carer on paper.
In terms of child maintenance, if you are paying in line with the CSA guidelines, then the amount he receives from you would go down as it would be adjusted to account for the nights that your DS spends with you.
If you have a private child maintenance arrangement, then sitting down together is probably the best option - perhaps try mediation if it's difficult?

I would suggest you let ex retain child benefit and tax credits fod DS2 as he will lose more than you would gain by them. But suggest that he pays half of them to you to cover costs in your time.

Can't you just discuss stopping paying maintenance to your ex for the 14 year old as you are going to share care?

Yes, adjust maintenance if you are paying any but let him keep the tax credits, at least for the time being. If your child decides to spend mire time with you than at his, that's the time to change tax credits, not now.

And don't even go into the "give me part of the tax credits" route, if the child stays with him 50.000000001 of the time, the money is his. He still needs to keep a house for his child to stay over.