Ok I'll preface this by saying I realize for many on here they have to deal with an XP who has no intention of stepping up to the mark, was abusive etc, is a lost cause.
That said I wonder if it's worth having a thread about people's positive experiences and advice about how to best work through a break up, how to avoid conflict, how to communicate etc with an XP. Or how you managed to get a difficult XP see a different point of view. However small.
I'll give an example.
When I split up with my XP I suggested that we each have an opportunity to have an uninterrupted rant monologue about the past. An opportunity to get it off our respective chests, and from that point, in the interests of dc of course, we would never again bring up the past. Hard as it can be.
It kind of worked, it certainly helped shift the focus to the future and dd.
This might be a terrible idea ( the thread ) or it might be helpful, thought I'd give it a shot.
So what has helped in your situation small or big ?