I'm a dating website lurker...

[CandyCrate]

I join dating sites, with a fake name, and no pictures/profile so I can see what kind of men are in my area.

I am scared to join for real! Half because I have no babysitter if I was to meet someone I wanted to date, and half because Im just afraid!! What if nobody messages me? What if they do and I can't get a babysitter to go meet them?

Ugh. Anyone else a wierdo like me?

LOL! I had about 2 or 3 glasses of wine one night a few months ago and went through this endless list for one website - can't remember which one now. it took HOURS to answer all the silly questions. When I'd got to the end I was told I wasn't eligible because I'd ticked "separated" !! Couldn't believe I'd wasted all that time!

Funnily enough it did make me think I was probably not ready though. After nearly a year I'm beginning to imagine the possibility of dating again.
I hear so many horror stories about internet dating though (as in awful dates) that I don't think I'd ever try that.

Obviously getting out the house occasionally would help my chances of meeing someone though! Rather than sitting on MN with a glass of wine on the evenings I don't have my children!

Good luck - and if you do try it in your own name and have a few dates, post to say how you get on!

I went on one with a free months introductory offer once, didn't give a pic same as you, but did a small profile - age etc.. got some emails but didn't feel inspired enough to pay up in order to read any of them, then took my profile down.

I'd say put up a bit of profile if its free (but no pic), see what happens, and if someone looks like a possible and messages you go from there, if noone messages you its not really personal as they don't know you, or what you look like IYSWIM

I used one for a while. Went on a few dates (and I'm not a hugely confident person).

If you go for it make sure you chat for a while so that you get to know whether they are who they claim to be, ask for a recent photo by email and always meet in a public place ideally during the daytime.

Personally I didn't have any nightmare dates but I didn't find the right man either. Probably helped me to feel wanted again though.

Good luck!
X

I joined one last night after posting this! I had had a few beers... Im starting to think I should take it down now! I did put a picture up, I dont know if anyone would message me without a picture?

I still have the babysitting problem. I have been single for two years so Im pretty ready for some dating. I am afraid thats its mostly men looking for one night stands though!

Oh good luck! Nothing ventured an' all that.. I didn't put a pic up as i live rurally and stand out like a sore thumb!

Just to add, there are lots of past amusing threads (and some success stories to balance it out) on the subject if you get disillusioned, but fingers crossed you won't

Dating sites are a fantastic ego boost! Being told you look beautiful even if they are a bit creepy is never a bad thing IMO and you don't have to reply to anyone! I was on one for a while last year and loved it , I'm not now though but it's a good ego and confidence booster!

& to top if off, you quickly start to know who the vain ones are & who the boring ones are.

i cancelled the one I had joined and went on eHarmony instead. The ads made me believe its less full of shag wanting wierdos and instead full of lovely men who want to get married :p

I signed up to match.com just to look at the men but didn't put on a pic or pay, so nobody can contact me and I can't see them. It costs £77 upfront for six months, or £30 a month!!

Can't quite bring myself to do it properly, not sure if I'm ready either... H only been gone 4 months.

If you put a profile up with no pic you will hardly get any replies.

I know, I havent joined properly, I just wanted to see what was on it before I paid any money, plus I dont want to join properly until my divorce is over..

Oh god - am just going through this now. Made a mess of the possible thing with a lovely, successful, foxy bloke because of my insecurities and am now trying again but the rest seem so creepy. Funny messages asking if i like anal, asking to meet up that night, asking how well i cook, signing themselves long johnny with a naked picture attached. Oh well - i will keep trying.

Oh ive been on a few but without a pic all i can say is avoid plentyoffish all the men i spoke to were just after sex. And one hasseled me for ages i had to change my phone number lol.But i have known people to meet normal men on other dateing sites.