hi had a bad day could use a friendly chat

[kialiana]

hi i'm new on here. i just found out today that my son has DDH and has to were a leg brase. i am really upset amd stressed i dont know how i will cope.

i was really hoping to find someone to talk to as i have never felt this alone before in my whole life.

Hi,welcome to mumsnet.Sorry you,ve had such a bad day.I,m sorry to say I dont know anything about your son,s condition but am willing to learn if you need to chat.

Come on mums net! There must be someone who knows all about this! I'm sorry that I am clueless but (as someone who has had to deal with medical issues with my kids) it is often the not knowing the outlook that is much scarier than any procedure. (Hope that made sense and you find lots of support here real soon)

Hi, sorry to hear that. Is that the hip brace? How old is your son?

basically he has a dislocating leg so has to be put in this harness type thing that keep his legs up like a frogs for a minimum of 6 weeks, thats no sitting up, no baths, no clothes that will fit proberly, it'll be impossible for him to learn to roll over stand or crawl untill it's off. plus the fact that he's so playfull he's going to hate not being able to moove his legs. he wont even be able to sit in his bounser. he's 4 months old and i've just started weening him how am i supposed to do that if i cant sit him up. he doesn't settle unless he has a bath before bed. how am i supposed to look after him if i cant sleep. i dont have anyone to help i'm really starting to panic

(DDH)developmental dysplasia of the hip...where the hip dislocates easily as the ball and socket joint has not developed fully. The leg brace is designed to keep the joint located well and to allow it to develop so it does not keep popping out.

sorry that you and he have to go thru' this OP but at least you will be in good hands with the treatment.

keep posting.

Hope you fee la little less alone...there's always someone here on MN to hold a hand.

oh op we cross posted.

I know it feels impossible but he will sleep, he will eat, you will find ways round it together...and it will be totally worth it.

bless you, I wish i was able to come and give you a big hug.

Sorry to hear about your son's conditions. Try to get some sleep. Take care.

www.rch.org.au/kidsinfo/factsheets.cfm?doc_id=10054 if you click on this link it tells you about the Pavlic harness and babies wearing it.

with children in the harness I used my clothes horse (heavy old one) to suspend different things from to keep them amused...changed them from fabric to spoons to cuddly toys to natural objects every half day or so. We also had tummy time in between each sleep/feed to keep the head control...they lie on their tummy and you lie on yours making faces at each other as you try to hold your head up.

Water filled playmats that are squishy and have little floating things to move about are good. Tin foil mirrors (watch he doesn't eat it!!)_ Money in a tin to shake, dried pasta shapes to push prod and look at.

You'll be ok Op

you will find ways to cope

Oh bless you. Will the health visitor or someone from the medical team come and answer your questions for you?
Sounds like a big shock for you.
Babies are resilient, he will probably take it in his stride :)
I understand it's usually somewhere between 6-12 weeks they need it for, is that right? May be you can defer weaning until he's finished?

I thought about the health visitor as well,maybe she might have some knowledge of support groups etc.

My daughter had this condition although it was late being picked up so the treatment was very different from what your ds will have. Not sure I can be of any help but ask any questions you want to ask. Big hugs to you.

My daughter whose both hips were found to be dislocated at one DAY old, had to have plaster on both legs with a bar inbetween but she could still move her legs and lift them up. No bathing until after the plaster was removed each week for a total of six weeks. The worst bit was that the plaster would be wet and make her clothes wet for the first 24 hours so it was easier to have her naked and cover her with blankets. She adapted to feeding and sleeping really well and thank goodness the treatment worked. I knew someone whose daughter had the same thing at three, she couldn't go to nursery for six months and had to learn to walk again. The childs mother had said something was wrong as soon as she started walking at 11 months but the doctor said it was the way she walked, yes because her hips were dislocated but refused to do anything until she was three. It's a worry but so much better to get it sorted whilst they are a baby, easier to carry them as well. My next child didn't have this problem if you are thinking of having any more.

the charity "STEPS" supports parents of children with DDH. They have a help line Mon-Fri 9.30-4.00 01925 750271

their web site is here www.steps-charity.org.uk/How-We-Help/treatment-methods-for-ddh.html

sorry that is 01925 750271

must be getting late!

It's so scary when something like this happens. You can do this. You and your lovely DS will adapt and time will pass.

I had a bad time when DS was born (my health, not his) and had to keep waiting for things to heal. You just get through it.

thankyou everyone. i've just had an hour long cry down the phone to my sister and am feeling a bit better. it's the weight thats killing me he's getting it on on friday. i have his jabs tommorrow too. fun!!!.

foolonthehill those links are very helpfull thanks.

i called my health visitor and she was no help at all. we dont get on very well i dont think she likes me. she makes me feel like she's weighting for me to trip up so she can contact social services.

i've allready started weening tylor so i cant really hold off now.

my main worry is the fact that most babies have the harness put on at apr 8-10 weeks. because he's older he's already used to the movement he has and routine we're in but he's also too young to be flexible in his routine or have any form of understanding of whats happening. i'm just worried he's going to take a while to get used to it and i have a bad back so it's allready quite hard to deal.

if it was any-one else i just would have given up but thats the thing about parenthood isn't it you'll be willing to give your life let alone anything else.

No you can't give up, you are right and one day you will look back and be proud of coping.

Routines can be changed and he will adapt...2-3 days is all it usually takes to establish a new way of doing things at this age.

keep on going.

thanks i feel better today still a bit down but tylor slept through the night and woke me up this morning not with his usuall winging or cryong but by laughing lol playing with his teddy.

still a bit down but am not paniking any more. and he is courently sat in his bounser playing with toys witch always makes me feel happy. a part of me thinks he new i needed a break today.

good for you.

post when you need to.

hi can the people who's children have had this pleese tell me what angle there baby's hip measured i dont have enough information to understand the severity of tylors condition

why dont you get this moved to childrens health ? you will get more responses ? click on report post and ask mnhq to move it for you

ask MNHQ to move his to childrens health and also change the title to something like "advice on DDH please" so you reach the people who know most about this

i have already posted on childrens health twice and no-one responded.

There are a few people on here who have been through the same thing and have been very healpful.

it's very different dealing with this stuff for single parents. i cant rely on someone being able to watch him for an hour or so while i eat, shower or sleep. i rely on his routine so i have time to do this stuff and i've found that 2 parent family's have no idea how much harder that makes everything. Thats why i posted this on here aswell as childrens health.

I do understand the loneliness and frustration. The children I have looked after I saw as a professional. they were mostly hospitalised because they were much older and had very severe forms of the condition, many of them were in body casts. Even they went home to be cared for by parents often.

You will not feel lucky in any way, I know. But you son is very young, he will adapt fast and he has a very good chance of a very good result from the harness/brace.

Take it one day at a time, concentrate on only the absolutely necessary things (eating, sleeping and hygiene). Your son can be left for you to have a shower/clean your teeth etc. He will be ok either on the floor or in his cot. His sleep routine will need to change but this should be ok if you put your mind to it and give him a new comfort routine instead of the bath...

You will do ok.

If things are pressurising you perhaps Homestart www.home-start.org.uk/about/what_we_do could visit to give some support for you as a lone parent.

Dd had a Pavlik harness fitted at 4 days old; her right hip socket was essentially flat, barely formed at all. She wasn't bothered by the harness at all; in fact the nurse took a pic of her to use to show other parents that the harness didn't bother them!

She wore it for 4 months, full time at first then gradually weaning off. She had regular hospital appts to check and loosen it.

She is now a happy healthy 7.5 yr old with no hip problems at all! She needed yearly scans til she was five, but nothing since.

Being caught at this age means they should be able to fix it really easily, and Tyler will get used to it very quickly.

I hope that helps!