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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Anyone else co-parenting young dc's with an ex DH with Aspergers?

7 replies

aspyqueen · 24/06/2012 17:45

Hi, Might be not many people in this situation, but hey, there has to be a few...
Recently split with DH who has AS. High functioning, but his concept of risk, danger with DS has always put the fear of God in me. Leaves him unattended in situations that, after I hear about it, make my blood run cold, loves danger and speed, etc. Has no clue of danger in fact until after the event. Oops DS just fell off a cliff edge or whatever.
Also there are the issues of not being able to communicate with him very easily. His failure to see another's point of view in terms of me needing money to support ds (not unusual in exes of course, not exclusive to those with AS). DS also not too happy being with him for long periods of time, i.e. longer than a day, but ex DH refusal to see this, thinks it's me poisoning DS against him. In fact I do the opposite, try to talk DS into realising his dad loves him. So DH wants to take DS away on holiday, but it makes us both shudder, ds because Daddy can get shouty and angry quite quickly and unpredictably, me because he won't watch him near water, roads, etc., won't notice if he's ill, or hurt.
Anyway I know lots of these fears aren't exclusive to exes with AS, but wanted to hear from others parenting with those with AS as there are some particular problems that i feel we face that others don't.

OP posts:
Fiveflowers · 24/06/2012 19:52

I feel for you as my ex has AS. But as our children are adults, I don't have this problem, so I'm bumping for you in the hope that someone in a similar position has some helpful advice.

aspyqueen · 24/06/2012 20:11

Thank you Five. Does this mean you co parented with him for a long time, albeit not after having split up? Very tricky too I imagine.

OP posts:
aspyqueen · 24/06/2012 21:23

bump

OP posts:
Socknickingpixie · 25/06/2012 05:19

How old is your son?

Actually is there anyway we could take this to private message or anything like that I have as so does one of my kids and I'm a lone parent but it's not something I'm really comfortable discussing in public iykwim

aspyqueen · 25/06/2012 09:03

Sock do you have an ex DH with Aspergers? Or do you mean you have Aspergers? You can PM me.

OP posts:
aspyqueen · 25/06/2012 15:57

bump

OP posts:
Fiveflowers · 25/06/2012 19:05

aspyqueen, I've PM'd you x

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