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Absent Dad earns thousands on eBay but offers nil maintenance..

10 replies

Challen · 12/06/2012 13:54

I have never asked for any maintenance from my children's absent father (age 3 and 5), although he does own two mortgage-free properties (one tied up in probate with his brother though), several cars, earns thousands selling specialist items on eBay but offers only minimum CSA contributions of £2.50 a week per child as he also (fraudently) claims benefits.

However, this year, I have had to take him out of his one morning per week nursery placement as I couldn't afford the £36 a month, my housing benefit has been cut by £100 with the new LHA calculations and I am now in debt with all three utility companies, two of whom are now auto deducting direct from benefits, needless to say, a humungous amount. I am currently a month and half behind with rent, because I have to use the rent as a float. My food cupboards are empty, my rent is due, so I must decide - Tesco online food shop or pay rent :/

Anyway, my question is, has anyone had experience of or heard of someone selling through eBay and being successfully chased by the taxman? I am reluctant to dob him in, but as I cannot get access to credit, cannot find a suitable job with part-time hours that would pay enough to even cover half of my rent here (village location, daughter in village school, I really don't want to uproot us all again to move somewhere cheaper..) I feel as if I have no choice for the first time.

I am currently selling peices of my furniture and literally the clothes off my back to make ends meet (all my Boden and Monsoon, Cath Kidston dresses...not ever able to afford to replace them again that is for sure) so I think I have reached desperation saturation point really.

But...do you just email the taxman and give his eBay ID? (Not that I know it, I think he's using a friend's right now). Are they even allowed to access info like his bank account/Paypal account? And lastly (mostly), I left a violent relationship with out two children, he would know I have dobbed him in, is it really worth the risk?
It is safe to say I am about to be bankrupted and can see us being evicted within months at this rate.

Exactly how do you go about informing various agencies that an absent father is lying about his income, because they will need proof, and of course I cannot provide proof of the houses he owns or his income, and he uses various fake names anyway so they would also have a hard time tracking him down. Effectively, I suppose, he is quite criminal in his dealings in this respect.

I am also posting this on other Topics in case traffic is slow in Lone Parents.

Thankyou anyone.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Mijbil · 12/06/2012 13:59

uuum... why have you never asked for maintenance before?

I wouldn't hesitate to dob him in, and would have done it years ago, especially with the fraudulent benefit claims.

Mijbil · 12/06/2012 14:01

secure.dwp.gov.uk/benefitfraud/

cestlavielife · 12/06/2012 14:03

report and leave hmrc to investigate

www.hmrc.gov.uk/reportingfraud/

Challen · 12/06/2012 14:07

Mijbil Never asked before as I was just about managing on the income I had and don't believe in asking for financial assistance from anyone, even their father, just for the sake of it. If I can manage myself, I don't need/want their input, I suppose.

Thankyou for the links cestlavielife , I will go there first.

OP posts:
hairytale · 13/06/2012 09:42

More fool you. It's not "financial assistance" it's a parent providing for his children.

Report him.

OfMiceandCats · 13/06/2012 09:43

I did read a report that HMRC are cottoning onto the thousands of people who run businesses on ebay yet never declare their income. So report him and also put in a claim through the CSA.

shrimponastick · 13/06/2012 09:48

But you do have financial assistance -
You claim housing benefit.
Report him. He is stealing.

HappyMummyOfOne · 14/06/2012 23:06

"don't believe in asking for financial assistance from anyone, even their father"

But your whole finances and rent are paid for for you, how is that not financial assistance?? Of course you should report him, parents should pay for their children not the state.

Shriek · 14/06/2012 23:31

the CSA will only require 2 months bank statements, which he HAS to provide legally, unless he has a multitude of bank accounts in different names, in which case he is in huge trouble.

niceguy2 · 15/06/2012 09:52

I'd say you should report him as he is fraudantly claiming benefits and avoiding tax. In other words he's stealing from the rest of us.

HOWEVER.....

Don't think for a moment this will help you out of your financial problems. It will take month, if not years for anything to happen. The CSA are as useful as a chocolate teapot and since he's officially claiming benefits they are unlikely to pursue the claim because well...he's claiming benefits.

I think you need some financial advice from a debt counsellor or maybe the CAB. If things are so bad, maybe it's worth going bankrupt to give you a fresh start. You may want to also consider moving (if possible) to somewhere cheaper.

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