Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

does a lone parent make a clingy child (and mother)?

15 replies

nightowl · 21/02/2006 15:55

after a conversation with a friend ive been thinking about this. we both have two children. the eldest see their fathers regularly (although fathers are pretty useless but not bad men really). our youngest dont see their fathers (dads arent interested). we both agreed that we're very clingy with the little ones, mainly because we've never had to "share?" them. the little ones seem more clingy than their siblings. would you agree?

OP posts:

Thanks

Report

spursmum · 21/02/2006 15:57

Not at all. My ds is not at all clingy, in fact he can't wait to get away at times!!

Thanks

Report

Bugsy2 · 21/02/2006 16:08

no, mine aren't particularly clingy. I work though, so they have other people looking after them - maybe that helps?

Thanks

Report

Mascaraohara · 21/02/2006 16:16

My dd is only 3 but wouldn't say she was clingy at all.

Thanks

Report

Loobie · 21/02/2006 16:53

Maybe clingy isnt the right word, i think i know exactly what you mean,its like an extra closeness cause you are all they have,protceting them from the fact their fathers are uninterested in them,not having to share them.
I ahve 3 kids and left their father when i was pg with no.3 dd,he says he loves her etc etc all the usual crap but really he dont give a monkeys hoot for her and she knows it!! I have the feelings between her and i that i think you are trying to describe,so guess that would be a yes for me.Dont know if i would say dd was more clingy but the relationship[ between her and i is definately different from the one i have with the boys who had their father around till we split.

Thanks

Report

Lacrimosa · 21/02/2006 16:55

Thanks

Report

Lacrimosa · 21/02/2006 16:56

sorry I should add I am a clingy mother to both children and only one is clingy back, so I think it ac n affect both types of parents

Thanks

Report

crazydazy · 21/02/2006 16:58

I was a very clingy child and my mother totally believed this was because my father walked out when I was 4.

As a result I turned into a very anxious teenager and adult.

Thanks

Report

crazydazy · 21/02/2006 17:00

Have actually had therapy for a phobia and the therapist believes that my phobia totally stems from the fact that I felt I was "abandoned" as a child by my father.

Thanks

Report

Loobie · 21/02/2006 17:06

Crazy dazy my dd attends a chiropractor on a regular basis and she does emotional technique work with her,she tells me my dd feels abandoned by her father and that she knows he rejected her,she feels that she has to work to earn her fathers love rather than just be given it as a child should from a parent,

Thanks

Report

crazydazy · 21/02/2006 17:10

Thats interesting Loobie because I believe thats why before I met DP I always went for men that I had to "work for their love" and the ones that were nice to me put me right off.

That was until I got pregnant with DD and so gave DP a chance (lucky for me).

He's still with me 7 years later and its only now that I am beginning to trust that he won't leave me.

Thanks

Report

Loobie · 21/02/2006 18:23

Its very intersting and quite amazing how much little children pick up from their surroundings even at very young ages,my dd is only 3 and even though we were separated ex-p was still around lots until he left the area 17mths ago,then obviously he didnt see them near as much,not he has no contcat with them whatsoever since early june last year,it is truly amazing thr difference it has made to all 3 of them,ds1 calmed down within about a month,he has severe autism and was on the roof 90% of the time with ex-p messing him about,ds2 stopped all his blatant naughty behaviours within a couple of weeks and dd became less clingy and unsettled within a couple of weeks,they ahve continued to be stable without his input.

Thanks

Report

7777777 · 21/02/2006 18:49

dd1 now 11 was a very clingy child and i did put it down to the fact that we were on our own and very very close as no contact with his father

Thanks

Report

7777777 · 21/02/2006 18:49

dd1 now 11 was a very clingy child and i did put it down to the fact that we were on our own and very very close as no contact with his father

Thanks

Report

beejay · 22/02/2006 12:38

Very close to my dd though wouldn't say clingy, she is very independent.
I imagine she is more dependent on me than if she was brought up in a household with siblings and a live-in father though.

Thanks

Report

beejay · 22/02/2006 12:41

Very close to my dd though wouldn't say clingy, she is very independent.
I imagine she is more dependent on me than if she was brought up in a household with siblings and a live-in father though.