Signed letter to take DS abroad on holiday?

[BelleCurve]

I'm separated from DS's dad, not yet divorced. I want to take DS on holiday for 1 week and usually carry his birth certificate copy with his passport as we have different surnames.

Do I need or should I try and get a confirmation from his dad, just in case of any questions?

If so, what should it say?

I never have done. However my DS had the same surname as me.

I think it dependson where you are going - Europe - should be okay with just birth certificate but any further afield - USA for eg - then definitely get something more formal.

But I can't just think of what to have it say at the moment.

I will ask him to sign something later, as we haven't yet got a residence order although DS lives fulltime with me.

I suppose there is no reason passport control would know we are separated, but I like to be sure!

As long as Dad knows you are going so he can't say you were spiriting your son away then it should be Ok I would have thought?

Passport control must deal with thousands of single parent families daily with this set up so they can't question them all!

Depends where you are going I suppose, some like the US are really strict with ID's . If in doubt why not ring the passport office?

call 0300 222 0000-from the directgov website.

I went to France and they did question the fact that I had a different surname than DS but I just explained I was his mother. I did not have a letter from his dad and they did not ask.

I have travelled alone many times with my DS who has a different surname to me and had different nationality for his first 5 years, I never took his birth certificate or any letters. First time I travelled alone to the other side of the world when he was 6 months old, I wasn't even separated from his father then.

I have been to the US but that was only for a few hours (in transit) and they were fine with us (although not with the half eaten apple in my bag).

I only tell ex if he asks for contact when we've planned to go away. He has no regular contact so I am not taking planned time away from him.

I am not a LP but I got a bit of trouble entering Canada with ds (double barreled surname but different nationality) when dh had arrived the previous week for a conference. We said we should really write letters for each other but haven't got round to it yet and coming back from Germany with ds by ourselves last week I didn't get questioned.

I've travelled abroad many times with mine (to France and Spain) and never been asked for any proof of anything. My DCs have a different surname from me.

I took DD to France last summer (different surname) and the man on the way back (because all good kidnappers kidnap the children back home) was really arsey with me. Twat.

dd went to france with friends last year and i wrote a letter just in case - don't think it was needed though

I travelled last year with my daughter, my friend and her two children who have their fathers surname (they are not married). No problems at all. On the way back the security asked her if the children belonged to her she said 'you could have asked that on the way out it would have been a more relaxing holiday!'. He didn't want any real proof and took her word that the children had their dad's surname and they never married. So I doubt you'd have problems.

Thanks I got a letter just in case. I have been questioned before, coming back into the country when DS was a baby. The passport officer asked how I got him and I said "the usual way"!

Depends on the country - look at Foreign Office travel advice for the country where you're going - www.fco.gov.uk/travel

Definitely if you're going to Canada and I believe US as well; I'm Canadian and DS' dad is British, I travelled with DS to Canada last year and was asked at the border to produce a letter, not even asked IF I had one.....the only reason I thought to do it before I left was because my parents have a friend who had problems when she travelled with her child. Applies even if you are married/joint custody, whatever, if you are travelling on your own to North America with a child you have to have permission from the other parent.

Literally came across this on Thursday. I am also separated not divorced and DS spends most of the time with me. Ex sees DS on a regular schedule. I have planned to take DS out to Italy (to our own flat). Call from my lawyer on Thurs to say that ex's lawyer had phoned. Ex had complained that although he didn't mind me taking DS abroad he wanted flight details. My lawyer said that technically ex has to agree to our holiday as he has parental responsibility too. Most of this is about control and knowing what I am doing.

What pissed me off was ex had DS for most of half term - took him abroad and only sent me flight details the night before. Generally we have let parents know these details so this timing is standard for us. Yet he has to get 2 lawyers involved.

I have a different surname to DS and I had issues at passport control last year again coming BACK INTO the UK! I nearly wrote and complained I was so annoyed.

If going to America then a definite yes. I have friends in a similar situation and this issue has cropped up more than once!