feeling blue

[vanillaspice]

just got back from a weaning group and had to walk past my ex's house (he lives across the road) ! Anyway he has obviously gone on holiday for the second time in six months ( the last time was when I was having his baby)! His girlfriends car is parked right outside. I feel rubbish he has never been to see his daughter and I have no money to pay for anything let alone a holiday! I decided against the csa as he is self employed and it would have to go to the courts. Just feeling tired, skint and fed up......sorry to moan :-(

Don't want to read and run. No advice, but (((hugs))) Moan away! My ex does pay maintenance but still has far more money than I do (plus the free time and social life etc!) and it does annoy me a bit! But you have your lovely daughter and he (by his own choices, I assume) doesn't, so what does he, really, have when it comes down to it? Nothing :)

Wow, excellent words from nurse, just what I wanted to say, you have it all, he has nothing.

You hang in there, you get the snuggles, the pictures you can't tell what they are, 'i love yous' from your gorgeous DD. seeing her in her first school play, helping her with homework, all the way up to feeling proud when she steps out into the world on her own. Holiday? Pah, let him keep his holidays, you got the better deal.
On another note, go to the CSA anyway. My ex is self employed, and while I haven't gone thought them, his ex wife did. It didn't have to go to court for an assessment to be made, it is based on his tax returns. You might be pleasantly suprised. Good luck :-)

Like others have said, in time you will realise that having your dd far outweighs what he has, its just a struggle right now with all the caring for her and with lack of money but as your dd gets older the things you will expericence with her are priceless.

My dd is now 16 and her dad left us when she was 3 and for a while he was a(useless) weekend dad but has not seen dd for some years. She is now a beautiful young woman who has passed 12 gcse's and is now at college. He has missed so much but i have been there for every minute, the downs as well as the ups but i would not have missed any of it for the world. I am so proud of her and i know the way she has turned out is because of my hard work not his.

I too would go to the CSA, they will assess his tax returns, dont think it goes to court necessarily. Its got to be worth a try.
Good luck and keep coming on here and having a moan!!