Am I being paid enough maintenance for my ds?

[xanthum]

I receive £140 per month for my ds. I think my ex earns around £25 to £30 K and he sees ds overnight for 2 nights a week and every other weekend. He says this is the correct amount and it seems low because of the number of overnights he has - on the whole about 60% me and 40% him. This amount really isn't enough as I pay for childcare costs, all clothes, all activities and in fact, everything for him.

Is this right? I feel I should have more as this amount doesn't touch the surface of costs. He is a tricky character but I feel I am being had.

What do you think? Thanks for your help!

I will watch this thread with interest as I am in a similar situation. I get 200 quid a month for 2 dc and he sees them for two nights every fortnight. So your doing better than me. have a look at csa website see what there calculator says?

Have you tried asking for a bit more?

Sounds fine to me for that salary tbh - I get £123 a month for my DD and her dad earns about 33k

He does have 2 other children though so they are taken into account. It was £185 before that.

The amount might be a little under but it isn't wildly off target, is what I'm saying.

Pudding that sounds very low, although I do get that it depends on the xh's income. I have guessed at his income and the CSA calculator comes out at about right. However, is it right that I have to pay for all activities too?

Thanks Lubey. Xh doesn't have any other children to worry about. Do you pay for all activities, clothes, childcare etc? This is the bit that's getting to me. He expects me to pay for absolutely everything and £140 goes nowhere - not that I expect it to cover everything but it is very short of the mark.

Do you get the child-benefit and tax credits?

Unfortunately, whatever activities you choose for your dc do have to come out of child mtce, or rather, the mixture of child mtce, child benefit, child tax credits, working tax credits and your own salary, assuming that you're entitled to TCs.

The CSA calculator is useful to work out what your ex should be paying. I would suggest having a conversation with your ex on the costs for ds. It is worthwhile breaking it down for him as often men (even if still married ones!) have little idea of the costs.
I would add up the annual childcare costs, school uniform, activities, haircuts, presents for friends parties etc and then work out what it is monthly. Assume you both contribute the same amount for your DS (i.e £140 per month plus CB, plus any tax credits) and agree with him that you both share the delta.

I had this strategy with my ex and it worked..just worth trying. However I would also mention that there is assumption that men are financially well off but in my DH's case his salary after the CSA contribution takes him to a level where we should be able to claim additional benefits but CSA payments aren't taken into account.

Sounds about right to me, too - my ex does pay a smidge more - but then doesn't have contact with DD anymore. But then I did have to go to the CSA to get it out of him after 5 years of empty promises. He is feeding/entertaining the DS when at his, is he? Not expecting you to provide for that?