Divorce and maintenace

[prettypurpledaisy]

I have been separated from exh for 2 years. This week he text to say he wants to initiate divorce preceedings which is fine. He has always paid maintenance for dcs but friend has told me when it goes to court I should be asking for maintenance for me.
Our separation has been mostly amicable and he sees dcs regularly and is very generous with them.
If I look for maintenance for me I think this will alter. I work as a teacher and although not rich always manage to pay everything each month.
Am I being niave not looking into it? I would prefer to not but it would be nice to have extra money each month.
Anyone been through it? Please advise. Thanks.

I didn't ask for anything for myself when I got divorced.. If he pays for the kids and you can afford to keep yourself I think it's a bit out of order !
My exH is in the army and I never touched his pension either.. If he's paying maintenance for you as well as the kids you can never really have a clean break !

Try mediation. You have to do everything together with ex and a counsellor/lawyer. But it cuts out the to-ing and fro-ing and expensive letters. All done cards on table etc!
We did it when first split but 2&1/2yrs on will have to do again as job circs have changed, but would rather do this than go staight to a solicitor, even if I do have to breathe his air!

I have no experience in this area but I would say it depends on a couple of things.

If he was unfaithful or abusive and if you had remained together you would have expected a certain lifestyle which you can't now have, then you should be entitled to some money.

Alternatively, if your ability to earn has been diminished by your marriage. I.e you stepped off the gas, moved job etc to support his career. Or perhaps took a career break to have kids. If these things mean you can't earn to your previous potential then he owes you.

I wouldn't ask for money for myself in your circumstances. Not saying it would be wrong to, just that I wouldn't. It would be different if you were struggling I guess.

I thought the same and don't want to affect the status quo but rl friends saying I should. Just wanted to ask all you lovely people your view, thanks for the replies :)

Little bit if experience here:

1. If he's in mega bucks and the standard of living you previously had is vastly different and he is still loaded. I mean vastly different.

1. If spousal maintenance has been paid previously.

Who knows if you will get it or not, ultimately that's up to a judge to decide. I would say that IMHO if you have a good set up now that you are happy with, is it worth ruining that by asking for ex to pay on top of maint?