How is this man allowed to be a public representative?

[Enfyshedd]

Cardiff County deputy leader Neil McEvoy has been suspended from Plaid Cymru following comments he made on Facebook about women?s groups that represent victims of domestic violence.

Dying to know what he said?

From BBC News website this evening:

"Councillor Neil McEvoy used the website to accuse a women's aid group of "publicly funded child abuse" for supporting women breaking court orders on child access."

Cllr McEvoy's Facebook page

Cllr McEvoy's Twitter page

Well its quite simple... Womens Aid receives the vast majority of its funding from Government (aka The State aka The Taxpayer). Lets not forget that Neil also has evidence of this.

I actually agree with him too. If a publicly funded "Aid" agency informs their victims to break a Contact Order... that is state funded/sponsored child abuse... not to mention utter contempt for the law!

Good Luck Neil... lots of people agree with you!

Um how does breaking a contact order constitute child abuse? That seems a very extreme word to use.

sick...just sick

Riakin if the contact order specifies access to a parent at a specific time and at that time the parent who is ordered to have contact is say completely intoxicated, shooting up on drugs, or some other reasons the welfare of the child is in danger. Do you suggest in these cases a parent who withholds contact as ordered by a court is abusing their child? Or do you conceed that in extreme cases such black and white interpretation of a breaking a court order is unhelpful?

whiteandnerdy,

You know exactly why Neil has said this:

Mothers have gone to Womens Aid for advice and been told to break contact Orders.
The evidence that he has does not list drug users, alcholics etc as people who have come to him claiming womens aid did this... much rather ex-partners looking for a way out of allowing contact.

Solicitors are also in on the act too (on Legal Aid) saying that "despite the Contact Order our client is not permitting Contact on xx/xx/xxxx" i've seen it! I've had it in my own case! Now you could argue that as it is Legal Aid... that too is state funded and state backed breaking of a legally binding order.

Its quite clear you have jumped on the typical bandwagon of "junkies and alcoholics" that all ex-fathers become after separation. The real fact is the vast majority of these cases that Neil has, are decent, hardworking and involved fathers who have had to fight to see their children and an Aid agency feels its god given right to defy the order of the law.

Why make such an issue over the small, tiny minority who may be "completely intoxicated, shooting up on drugs" many mothers are also just as likely to do the same.

It's all a bit vague isn't it? There are all sorts of reasons why a woman ends up in a refuge, and all sorts of reasons why the workers there may suggest that they don't go along with the contact order. The Courts don't always make the best decisions. Perhaps its because the workers involved genuinely believe there is some risk to the child or some risk to the mother.

One needs to be very, very careful, and examine one?s own conscience and motivations and judgements, and then realise that all generalisations based on gender, social class, status, or any kind of past experience of similar-sounding cases, are not to be in one?s mind when one makes assessments of each new case. There are people who?ve abused the system in all kinds of ways and for all sorts of reasons, and some of them are self-motivated and don?t always have childrens? best interests at their core. Then there are people. of BOTH genders, who genuinely try to do what they believe is the right thing, and may get pilloried for it.

Any sweeping judgement made by a member of a council or any public body shows a lack of integrity and, ultimately, a lack of intelligence, which in itself is not a crime, but is dangerous in any one with any status or power in the public domain.

Riakin, the reason I commented on your post was not jumping on any bandwagon about junkies and alcoholics, it was the fact that this Wednesday not 18 hours before your post which implies that people who don't keep to contact orders are 'child abusers' I found myself having a real issue with keeping to the contact order. My child was really upset with the prospect of returning to his mother, yeah that right I'm a farther and NRP. He's refusing to get into the car, at what point am I abusing my child, should I physically force him into the car so as I get to his mothers on time? When I did get to his mothers he again refused to get out of the car, should I of dragged him out of the car kicking and screaming. I tried to talk to his mother about how upset he was, I got "it's your responsiblity to get him here at 7" and a door closed in my face. I try and phone to see if his mother will talk with her son to say everythings going to be alright, "but she's not interested in talking with him." Eventually I ask him to goto her door and talk with her, and he agrees as long as I wait in the car and not drive off. He goes to the door of him mothers and her husband answers the door, tells him to get inside and he refuses and so I see him close the door in my sons face. My DS then runs back to me in tears, again take another 10 minutes to calm him down again he goes to his mothers door and again my Ex's husband answers the door tells him to get inside, again he refuses and again the door is closed in his face.

At this point it's about 1 hour after I'm supposed to give contact back to his mother. So I drive why my DS to the police station to ask what on earth I am supposed to do in this situation. Strangly enough they didn't say I was abusing my child, maybe because it would be stupid and unhelpful in this particular situation. But hey clearly being a responible farther is as easy as simply following a court order and maybe next time I should just physically drag him out of my car and force him into his mothers house, less people like yourself who know alot more about my DS and the particular problems that he faces brand me a child abuser.

I used the example of "completely intoxicated, shooting up on drugs" because it's a clear cut example of you talking utter rubbish, rather than all the other possible shades of grey that exist when dealing with children, and acting in what is and isn't in their best interests. I've seen your kind of response to when talking to bigoted idiots before, whenever people say rubbish like "all black people", or "all men" or "all women" whenever people make such sweeping statements like this and then defend themselves after makeing such stupid sweeping statements I very quickly class as bigoted. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I am a child abuser if you want to call the police round to arrest me for child abuse then fine I can PM you my address and you can protect my children from me. Or alternatively you may go so far as to appreciate that sometimes these issues are not as clearcut as we would like and your comments are somewhat inflammatory to people like myself stuggling to do what's in a childs best interests.

Sorry don't want to hijack this thread.

whiteand nerdy your poor DS. are you able to get any kind of support, maybe family therapy/child psychologist to draw out of him the issues and decide what would be in his best interests?
and how to handle these situations?

his feelings should be listened to.... his anxiety over handovers needs to be addressed - can you go with him to GP in first instance?

I have every sympathy with any parent, whether resident or non-resident, male or female whose ex uses a child in any way to get back at him/her. Clearly white and nerdy you were faced with a dilemma and forcing your son to do anything when he was distressed at the prospect of leaving you would have been cruel. Children need to see parents co-operating even if those parents have come to hate one another. They do not need to put such feelings of hatred into words or deeds in front of a child. They both need to suck it up and get on with trying to make the very best out of what will always be so difficult for children. My own situation has been more unusual - my children made different choices - the two who chose their father have seen me demonised and will hardly speak to me. The one who is with me only ever hears me make positive statements about her father, despite it all. That has been hard, so hard that I don't have the words to describe it but I am an adult. I cannot defend any mother or father who tries to diminish an ex in a child's eyes. If there is abuse or cruelty then children must be protected and be with the responsible, nurturing parent, whether it is the mother or the father. One very difficult area is the introduction of new partners - insisting on them being around when children are trying very hard to come to terms with being separated from one parent can be (no, not always, I realise that) really distressing, difficult for children to understand and downright inappropriate in some cases. Those who insist in the face of childrens' distress are selfish. Yes, it's great to meet someone new, fall in love again, have sex or whatever but discretion is needed while children come to terms with new situations. Right, will go and make tea and lurk to observe this interesting thread...