Need Help/Advice, No Money or Family

[alis74]

Hi

I just need a rant and want to get things down, I am also wondering if anyone has felt as hopeless as me.

Everything in my life is temporary, a temporary job and a temporary house (private rental)

I work full-time with an agency I am trying so hard with interviews on a weekly basis and can't get permanent work, I am working for a minimum wage. I live with my 13 year old dd in private rental and I am struggling so hard to pay this, support my dd.

The house I am living in is a dump. I rented it, in June and my landlord told me the house would be freshly painted, garden fixed and a heating system put in. I have emails and texts to back this up. Same old story regarding landlords she has done nothing. I am devastated and just don't know how to get out of the place (I didn't sign the contract though, she just took her money and gave me a blank one)

This morning was awful for me, I keep the place as spotless as I can and I found a great big slug on the wall. I just stood and cried it is my last straw. The place is also damp and I just can't afford to heat it (it is oil) for the winter. I am not entitled to any housing benefit.

I also do not have a deposit to pay for another home and I just feel like telling her when she is looking for her money that I have lost my job, and just give someone else her rent as a deposit iykswim.

My husband (still married, I can't afford legal fees :( and I dont get legal aid) stopped paying maintenance 6 years ago, the CSA can't find him. Recently they got a liability order on him but I am not holding my breath as they can't find him yet again.

The CSA called me last week to tell me that I still own a house (jointly) I asked them can they do anything but they told me to contact a solicitor to force a sale if I want. (by the way I left the marital home with my dd, and husbands family told me that house was nothing to do with me due to the fact that husband pays mortgage)

I feel crap as I went to see a solicitor to be told they can do so much - just found out today not entitled to legal aid.

I just don't know where to turn, or what to do anymore. I have no money, friends or family

ps I applied 5 years ago for a housing executive house and I am not a priority

Sorry for the rant

Right, have a big hug first of all. I think the main problem here is that you are totally burnt out. You've been struggling along for ages, having everything thrown at you, you're exhausted and depressed, it's all just got too much, and even simple practical steps seem impossible to you.

I would recommend seeing the doctor to see if you can get counselling, maybe even ADs for the short term.

Then, you need a break. I know it's controversial, but I would recommend not taking another temp. position after this one ends, and, yes, going on HB for a bit. Claiming HB is not always hassle free, so gird your loins for a bit of to-ing and fro-ing, but if you claim straight after one rent day, your claim shooouuuld be up and running for the next. If not, let the sodding ll wait for it for a couple of weeks.

This will give you plenty of free time to catch up on some sleep, chill out, do some (free) things you like doing, and, when you feel a bit better, make some plans about what to do next. Looking for a better paying job? Pursuing the ex for maintenance? Does not having a job now mean you qualify for legal aid to be able to do that?

I wouldn't recommend giving in any notice on the house, or saying anything to the ll, until you have lined up a better place to go to. And, if she gives you notice to quit, that gives you a stronger case to try for social housing.

And just keep visualising yourself in a much better place in a year's time!

(I hope I don't sound preachy, I felt like you sound a few months ago- kicked out of our private rental, no money, car bust, bills and hassle from all sides- most things resolved for the better now, and feeling so much happier!)

Hi Maledetta

Thank you, you are right (your advice) I am at breaking point and seeing my gp tomorrow.

Anyway my only worry if I dont work is how the hell do I heat my home (oil)

My list of woes goes on, but I am just totally devastated

Oh, I feel for you, oil can be a bastard- paying for a tankful up front...Do any of the oil suppliers near you offer a payment plan?

Our new house has got storage heaters-and only storage heaters. So no getting free wood out of the hedgerows this year (gulp).